Not sure what to do


Not sure what to do

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    March 1, 2016 at 5:48 pm #94743
    Not sure what to do

    Hi All,
    Basically i’ve been seeing this girl for the last month and a half.
    Things have been going well, like really well.
    We’ve made out, had sex, we hold hands and kiss sometimes.. although she’s not used to the hand holding and kissing yet, her last 2 boyfriends were abusive and she’s been through a lot with abusive father etc.
    She told me at the start she’s bi, but didin’t really say what she prefers.

    Now, we had a chat and basically she finds it weird being with a guy as she says she’s 90% gay and wants to find out for sure before making things anymore official, she’s always been on the fence, her 1st ex left her because she couldn’t decide if she was gay or straight.
    She wants to keep things as it is but she doesn’t want to promise a future, i don’t really expect her to promise anything anyways because it’s only been a month and a bit..
    I’m just not sure what to do.. i’ve never been in this position.

    March 1, 2016 at 5:48 pm #94744

    Part of me wants to keep it like it is which she wants too so she can see if she’ll change and if it the weirdness goes away, but she also wants to be single and explore her gay side to see if that’s what she really wants.

    I’m happy to be with her and her explore her gay side but what boundaries do i set?
    But the thing is, she doesn’t want to see other guys, she’s just not sure about guys in general but she’s told me if she wants to see a guy she’d always see me, because i make her happy and all that.

    Any tips? Part of me wants to let go and let her explore and hope she comes back but part of me wants to keep seeing her exclusively like we are and hope the weirdness goes away, i’d probably cut the hand holding and only kiss back when she initiates to help make up her mind.

    By the way, she’s 20 and i’m 22.

    Thanks guys.

    March 1, 2016 at 10:36 pm #94752

    She’s young and doesn’t know what she’s talking about lol. If you don’t mind her experimenting with girls, this could become a really great thing for you although you’ll have to forego a serious relationship. On the other hand…huge potential for sex with multiple partners simultaneously.

    March 3, 2016 at 7:11 pm #94947

    Sorry man… IDK what to say, I would never data a bi girl.. Best of Luck

    March 3, 2016 at 10:44 pm #94953

    Go with your heart….

    March 4, 2016 at 10:28 am #94963

    Trust me .. Become emotionally distant and treat her as a good time. She’s young, trendy and will eat u Alive if u show your heart. So either drop her totally, become a friend with benefits or use her to occupy your time until you find someone who’s interested. She’s telling u that’s what she’s doing with u. I’d never date a bi girl ..

    March 7, 2016 at 8:50 am #95020

    Thanks all,

    She’s told me yesterday that she doesn’t want to lose me and doesn’t want to lose what we have.

    I built the courage to tell her you can go out and get with girls, but she said that’s not what she wants? she just wants to understand it all.

    Does that change anything?

    March 8, 2016 at 4:34 pm #95230

    I’m with the others who said stick to friends with Bs here – keep this one light and don’t get your heart bruised. She’s got a lot of baggage and to say the least is sending strong signals that she could flake.

    Keep it light.

    March 8, 2016 at 10:00 pm #95240

    follow your gut