Not sure what to do


Not sure what to do


  • NinaMarie
    October 13, 2016 at 2:43 pm #114021
    Not sure what to do

    Hi, everybody..

    I’d been emailing with this guy for a couple of weeks. He lives a couple of hours away, and he said that he wanted to come meet me in early November, after he returns from a two-week trip back east doing math lectures. He leaves in two days for this trip, and I know he’s really busy. But it’s been three days without any response to my last email, and I’m considering emailing him again to ask if he still plans to come. I don’t want to be pushy, but neither do I want to just be wondering if he’s lost interest, met someone else, etc.etc. Do you think it’s ok to email him just to check in to see if plans are still a go? Thanks very much.

    October 16, 2016 at 6:15 pm #114236

    I don’t think it’s unreasonable or “pushy” for you to inquire if he still intends to meet with you. You’ve said you’ve emailed and he hasn’t responded yet but I need to clarify if you’ve already asked if he still intends to come in that email and should ask again, or if you’ve haven’t asked at all and should ask.

    If you’ve already asked, once is enough. If he was really that interested in meeting, he wouldn’t want to make the effort and have it come to nothing when you can’t make it because he didn’t give you enough notice for you to make room in your schedule for him. He would be planning ahead. He would want to make sure you are meeting him too. I wouldn’t quickly be disheartened if you’ve asked and he hasn’t replied yet, as you have said, he is on a trip and may be busy. Just wait for the response.

    If you haven’t asked yet, you are at full liberty to ask. You need to know if you should keep some time aside for him or if you are free to do as you please.

    • This reply was modified 1 week ago by  MiniMogal.

    October 24, 2016 at 8:58 am #114965

    Thanks so much, Minimogal. That’s good advice. I did email once (after I’d posted here) to check if he was coming, and he got back to me right away and said he definitely was. But who knows in the mercurial world of online dating, because he’s gone silent for three days again. I’ll just take your advice, and wait it out for now, and then if silence continues, just write him off. Thanks again.