Second date help


Second date help

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    June 6, 2018 at 7:14 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

    Hey forum readers! Just a quick heads up that a few dating sites are offering a FREE trial to DatingAdvice forum readers. Try it now and meet local singles in just a few minutes! Here are the sites:

    Site Who You'll Meet Today's Deal Casual dating for ages 18-65 Get FREE access
    Elite Singles Educated professionals 25 and older Get FREE access Hookups, casual encounters Get FREE access

    What are you waiting for? One mouse click could be all that stands between you and your next romance!

    January 8, 2013 at 1:01 am #20183
    Second date help

    So, I need a bit of advice. I went out on a date with someone that I met online. We’d been taking for… almost a month now really. Things went really well; I may have played it a bit conservatively but she still seemed very interested in seeing me again. Problem is, I don’t want to blow my chances at getting to that point by being overly smothering or needy…

    So, I called her the next day, got her v-mail, and left her a message about how much fun I had, nothing too serious. Then we got to texting back and forth. So now, its 3 days later, and I’m just getting worried I might be a bit too intense so I’m dialing it back a bit.

    My question is this. I definitely want to see her again, preferably this weekend, and it seems like she’d be down with doing that too. What I want to know is how should i approach this? I had a couple of ideas…

    My first was to not text her back tomorrow, since I was the last one to send a message, and then get back to her Wednesday and ask her out via text. Kind of lame, but I don’t want to come off as overbearing and always needing to talk. TO be honest, I’d love to keep messaging her, but so many people and sites say to keep it distant for a while… not sure why since I’m not very good at these games…

    My other idea was to text her tomorrow and tell her that I’m gonna be busy all day, so if she tries to get a hold of me I’ll be busy, but that I’ll call her Wednesday night. Not sure if I should include a bit about “maybe we can plan something for this weekend then?”, as that might be a bit too needy too. At the same time though, it definitely shows that I’m interested, so I’m conflicted.

    So how should I go about doing this? I really don’t want to mess this up…

    January 8, 2013 at 9:57 am #20186

    I wouldn’t look at this as a day-by-day thing. You have her attention, you guys hit it off, so you’re good! Take it easy. Best advice I would say is think of her right now as just another girl classmate or friend coworker. When would you text them to ask them out for the weekend? Probably not till thursday or friday because inviting too soon would be random and perhaps too early to make plans. You could say you’re “considering” going to watch a game at a friends place or planned on getting lunch with other friends on saturday…leaving things pretty informal will let her see that you value her friendship first and foremost. Don’t jump into anymore serious dinner dates unless she’s the one suggesting it.

    Keep it simple and go with the flow! Don’t worry, she’ll hang out with you 🙂 IF for some reason she needs to cancel try to hang out the following week and see what her schedule is like then, don’t over think the little things just yet!