Self-esteem holding me back with girls

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Self-esteem holding me back with girls

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    wadamski93
    Participant
    November 7, 2015 at 12:35 pm #88096
    Self-esteem holding me back with girls

    I am 22 years old with very limited dating experience. I had a bad experience with the only girl I’d ever been remotely serious with. She had some intimacy issues and I basically poured my heart out to her, wanting to help her get over her anxiety and be together. In the end I had to give up as I was doing so much for her and she was just blanking me. But it left me feeling pretty worthless. So much so that when I first meet a girl I like, my first thought isn’t “Maybe I should ask her out” but “She deserves better than me.” I’ve just met this amazing girl. She is clever, funny, cute and kind. Part of me thinks she might like me just from the way she has acted around me, but I have this voice in my head telling me that she would never take a second look at me. I really want to ask her out but I’m finding it hard to think why she would want to say yes. Maybe I’m just being an idiot, but I feel pretty confused.


    Sir82
    Participant
    November 11, 2015 at 1:48 pm #88309

    Alright man I feel like I have been in the same boat as you with your ex girlfriend situation so let me tell you what got me better in a way. A few months after we broke up I had to move to another city and the breakup hit me hard so i withdrew me from all the things i loved before i loved her. I had lost most of my confidence and just went on with my new routine and a couple of months went by and i still felt like there was something missing. Then a friend asked me if i wanted to go do these hobbies from my past with him. And to try to keep it short i got my confidence back by doing the things i loved before my ex as simple as that. So my advice to you start doing something you love and you will slowly start feeling better about yourself (it sounds horrible when say this but i mean good). As for the girl my advice dont make a big move yet first feel good about who you are otherwise you might miss out on something great in the future. Good luck


    RZOA
    Participant
    November 11, 2015 at 9:44 pm #88319

    Just ask her.
    I realize how that sounds but you’ll never know whether or not she’ll say yes if you don’t try, and worst case scenario she says no.


    artak
    Participant
    November 24, 2015 at 8:29 am #88912

    I felt the same way but one day I just decided that it’s not worth overthinking everything so just go and ask her. Even if she says no, don’t let it get over your head, not all women will want to go out with you and you should be fine with that.


    Chrono
    Participant
    November 26, 2015 at 2:28 am #89014

    Overthinking gets you nowhere in the end, it only frustrates into madness.

    If you decide to do something, don’t chicken out, just do it. It’s hard, but eventually it really pays of.


    theMinionLad
    Participant
    November 26, 2015 at 4:25 pm #89026

    .

    foxcr
    foxcr
    Participant
    November 27, 2015 at 1:59 am #89042

    I’ve gone through a similar experience. Just have faith in yourself and don’t self-doubt. Confidence will take you a long way. Start asking girls out and the more you do the easier it will get. You might be rejected or not, but if you don’t try you ‘ll never know.

    Don’t think, just do!