She asked me if I was flirting with her. Did I respond correctly?

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She asked me if I was flirting with her. Did I respond correctly?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    tennesee47
    Participant
    March 9, 2017 at 10:58 pm #129686
    She asked me if I was flirting with her. Did I respond correctly?

    I have a female friend who is in an unhappy relationship. We have gone out together drinking a couple of times and she opens up and tells me how unhappy she is, etc. It has been flirtatious between us at times, but I never crossed the line. Today, we were texting, and the conversation today ended as shown below. I wouldn’t mind dating her, but I don’t want to ruin a friendship by crossing the line and making a move. Is she interested in me based on this exchange? What should I do now? All opinions are welcome.
    Her: I don’t mean to sound full of myself, but is this flirting?
    Me: I’m not sure what you classify as flirting
    Her: I’m clueless. I don’t know either.OK good I’m glad we cleared that up
    Me: Yeah, cleared up the fact that neither of us knows what classifies as flirting. I don’t mean to sound full of myself…LOL
    Her: Stop! Lol I was just checking.
    Me: You should know that if I really liked someone I would tell them directly.
    Her: I guess I won’t have to worry until you do that;)

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 10, 2017 at 2:40 pm #129789

    nope.. nothing there. she has a bf and hasn’t left him (happy or unhappy) and so you are her friend and “goto to make her happy again when she’s not with bf” – but the hard lesson is.. that does not mean she’s thinking of leaving him for you or sees you that way.

    infact in most cases they never do.

    to me it’s clear there is no interest on her part here.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    March 10, 2017 at 2:45 pm #129790

    oh sorry.. you asked “did you respond correctly?” so disregard my last post but i’ll keep it there for references only.

    I would’ve responded a lot different. your response makes you appear to be wanting to say something but not have the gutzpa to do it (the balls). and that’s the worse thing you can have a female thnk about you – that you lack confidence and gutts to go for them.

    So i woul’dve gone this wrote:
    “r u flirting with me?”
    “wow.. took you long enough… welcom to the island Gilligan” (or some other teasing smartass comment to laugh over)

    at that point she may be direct and tell you she’s not interested…
    or she’ll laugh and keep flirting or allow you to keep teasing her..

    it doesn’t mean she’s interested but it plants the seed that you are and maybe somewhere down thge line she’ll remember you had the gutts and confidence when she’s single again. but as long as she’s with him – no going after her – it’ll never work and doens’t look good.


    maryb
    Participant
    March 10, 2017 at 4:21 pm #129814

    Yes she interested give her some time and let her end things with her boyfriend and then I feel you guys can take things further. Shes interested and she used that flirting convo to see where you stood.


    Oklahomer52
    Participant
    March 10, 2017 at 7:41 pm #129835

    I wasn’t sure what to think but she asked me out to get drinks after work on Monday night……guess I’ll play it cool and see where it goes


    ineedacab
    Participant
    March 12, 2017 at 1:02 am #129849

    My guess is she’ll say she likes you too, but she won’t leave her boyfriend for you. Seen too many examples IRL where that step was never taken by the woman. She just wanted a relationship on the side.