Should he give it one more shot?

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Should he give it one more shot?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    bumbletown88
    Participant
    May 12, 2015 at 1:22 pm #78775
    Should he give it one more shot?

    My buddy was dating this girl about a month ago and he fell for her pretty damn quickly. They went on three dates and all the signs were looking good, physical contact etc and she text him after saying about staying round his apartment the next week in NYC. However he didn’t hear from her so text her. She made excuses for that weekend and arranged to come the next weekend. Then on that weekend she text him saying that she basically wasn’t looking for anything serious with anyone at the moment. That was about a month ago and they’ve had no contact since. I have told him that he needs to get over it and move on, which is the obvious answer, but he wants to give it one last shot as he felt this girl was into him and doesn’t really know where it went wrong. I’m trying to convince him not to but he feels he wont get over it if he doesn’t. If he does, would anyone have ideas on how to play it from here?


    JeffS
    Participant
    May 12, 2015 at 3:53 pm #78787

    She clearly changed her mind about how she felt when she originally agreed to spend the weekend at his apt. When someone doesn’t want to do something with you, you need to respect their decision and leave them alone. So the only way I recommend him “playing this” is to delete her number and find someone else.


    bumbletown88
    Participant
    May 12, 2015 at 6:06 pm #78804

    Yeah I completely agree that she changed her mind and it’s important to respect that but he’s just struggling with closure from it as couldn’t really gauge whether she was interested or not. Obviously not in the end but he struggling with the why. Agree thought that he should just leave it there and move on. Don’t see what good can come out of contacting her again. Thanks.


    bumbletown88
    Participant
    May 13, 2015 at 8:29 am #78805

    Although he has nothing to lose……


    petera24
    Participant
    May 13, 2015 at 8:32 pm #78965

    The guys pretty much said it all. Something made her change her mind about you friend. It makes sense why your friend would think there is still something there because he didn’t get any closure. But I think he should forget about her and move on. She changed her mind pretty quickly so suppose he was able to get her to hang out again, who knows something might happen again and she does the same thing.


    bumbletown88
    Participant
    May 14, 2015 at 11:53 am #78998

    Thanks for your response. Agree she changed her mind pretty quickly and I’ve told him a million times he needs to accept it and move on but he seems adamant on contacting her again. Not the best idea I know. It’s been weeks since they last spoke now anyway. I think he just genuinely saw something in her that he really liked hence why he’s finding it difficult and as the signs were looking good from the start, he was confident something was going to happen with this girl. I said if he really feels that strongly and is certain on giving it one more shot then he has nothing to lose, but needs to get over it after that as it’s unlikely she will feel any different.