Should I be worried about her cheating? Am I paranoid? I need feedback

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Should I be worried about her cheating? Am I paranoid? I need feedback

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    jtb333
    Participant
    August 18, 2017 at 3:04 pm #146104
    Should I be worried about her cheating? Am I paranoid? I need feedback

    Anyway, so my GF and I have been dating for about 5 months now. Things are great between us and she is always happy to see me, and everything seems to be going pretty well. My problem is, a guy name Bob ( name changed). So my GF sent to a party a couple months ago without me there, where she said Bob seemed to take an interest in her, asked for her Snapchat ( which she gave), and temporarily left party with her and a couple of his friends to drive her around in his truck just for fun. She told me about this. About a week later Bob is her second best friend on Snapchat, second to me. I’m very concerned at this point and I wonder what’s really going on. Time passes and this guy starts to say how much he likes her and that he’s waiting for us to break up. He calles her confessing his love, and tries to drive to her house to hangout with her even tho she says no. I have to tell my GF to stay away from him and she does…. until now she’s asking to talk to him strictly as friends. Help??


    Yogasavage
    Participant
    August 18, 2017 at 5:30 pm #146136

    Start putting a lot more effort into yourself and give more energy to your girlfriend. This issue shouldn’t have come as far as it has if you had shown your unconcern for other men being interested in her. Women will throw this out to test your resolve and if you become worried she strays further. She has the control now in the relationship obviously, she knows it, and feels probably she could get away with this and itll actually make you fight for her more and she’s probably right. Invest in yourself, your passions, make yourself more attractive and pull her into your reality not the other way around.


    jtb333
    Participant
    August 18, 2017 at 7:59 pm #146137

    Well, let me provide some more information. I’m incredibly driven, an amateur boxer, and am currently going to uni to be an engineer. I’m no brad Pitt but I’m decently “popular” as one would call it. I put a lot of time into myself. There’s not much more than I can do. She’s constantly talking about how I’m all she ever wanted in a guy, how I can satisfy her sexually, emotionally, etc. She’s always so excited about seeing me, asking me how my day went. I can’t think of any way to improve my end of the relationship. I can be a little cautious with her and guys ( clearly) , but I definitely don’t obsess over it. I’m still confused


    betsy boodles
    Participant
    August 19, 2017 at 2:46 pm #146165

    Ask her how she would feel if it was the other way around? Open up to her and explain how you are feeling. Perhaps ask if you can meet ‘Bob’ if he’s no threat then is shouldn’t be an issues as far as your GF is concerned…after all he is just a friend?
    My only worry is that she knows he likes her and for me, if I had a BF I’d be cautious about spending time with another man I knew fancied the pants off me. ‘Bob’ doesn’t want to be just friends even if your GF does. Hope that helps.


    John334
    Participant
    August 19, 2017 at 6:57 pm #146172

    Like you said, your girlfriend asked him to talk as friends and not to flirt I suppose? If you knew this girl for a while I bet you know if she can keep her promise or not. My best advice is to aak her to introduce you to this guy Bob. Good luck..


    rammz
    Participant
    August 20, 2017 at 3:06 am #146181

    If you are not comfortable with her having him as a friend then you should tell her. She needs to respect that after what he has done. Your relationship shouldn’t make you feel worried all the time.


    jtb333
    Participant
    August 21, 2017 at 10:54 am #146147

    And just to clarify, bob asked HER to start talking as friends again. So she came to me to ask


    jtb333
    Participant
    August 21, 2017 at 11:12 am #146201

    Thanks for the replies. I should clarify that he asked HER to talk again, so she came to me. Also, they’ve only ever met once in person as they only talk over Snapchat. Anyway, I’ve expressed my concern about it and she seems understanding. I decided to let them still talk, however she said she’d have no problem if I was opposed to it. She stressed the importance of being open and not being afraid to speak what’s on your mind, and overall I think most of my worries were dealt with.


    reidybey
    Participant
    August 21, 2017 at 1:03 pm #146339

    Relationships are built on trust. If it’s early on in the relationship she might be doing it just to make you jealous, who she REALLY wants is you.