Should I call/text her after a month?

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Should I call/text her after a month?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 20, 2016 at 10:50 am #100856
    Should I call/text her after a month?

    So there’s this girl who’s really sweet and maybe shy. We would bump into each other at work and chat a bit, but not more than a minute or so because it always was very busy (no flirting was involved) Her last day at work she left some important documents on my desk and left. When I finally got around to them I discovered she had left a small piece of paper with her name and number on it. I was actually pretty surprised because this had never happened before to me. So after a few days I called her up and we went for coffee. It went well, but it seemed I would initiate most of the conversation. She also mentioned she had some personal issues going on that period several times. Now I have to say I’m not experienced when it comes to dating (this was my first ever) so when I payed for the coffee and walked her to the place she was going to meet her sister (it was in my direction so I offered) because I was still very uncertain of my feelings I didn’t initiate a second date idea.


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 20, 2016 at 10:51 am #100857

    We simply kissed on the cheeks (common friendly greeting in my country) and went our separate ways. Now, I decided I was truly uncertain of my feelings but would like to go out with her one more time. On the other hand I felt like I should give her a way out if she didn’t feel the same. So I texted her the next day (late hours) telling her how much I enjoyed talking to her and I thanked her for finding the time to see me even though she was preoccupied with other affairs (I never knew what they were; it didn’t seem right to ask on a first date) and wished her well on the matter. And afterwards I told her I would be “receptive” (that’s as close a word as I can find to what I said in my language) of another outing with her if she found the time and wanted to. She responded likewise and said she would like to talk to me again when her personal affairs allow her to. After a couple weeks I texted her again wishing her happy Easter she responded likewise. It’s been a month since our date.


    Avalanche
    Participant
    May 21, 2016 at 4:32 pm #100929

    Definitely call her again. Time does not matter.


    bexxx143
    Participant
    May 22, 2016 at 12:01 am #100947

    Having a relationship with a coworker can be awkward and can ruin a relationship unless you decide to date exclusively

    EmmaSwan
    EmmaSwan
    Participant
    May 22, 2016 at 2:23 am #100950

    If shes not calling you shes not interested. Move on.


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 23, 2016 at 9:07 am #100916

    I really have no experience in dating and I’m afraid I blew it. This was my first date ever as I mentioned after all. I thought I would feel something more than just confused and that would help me make a decision and suggest a second date. Didn’t happen though. Is this normal?

    Plus I expected to spark a conversation with her after I sent her a text wishing her Happy Easter which she responded to in the same manner and never initiated something else. If she was interested wouldn’t she?

    I think I will contact her one last time, just cause I have to be certain of her feelings to move on. Should I do this via phone or text though? It’s been a month and I don’t know how smoothly a phone call would go. What would you suggest I say to her? Thanks again!


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 23, 2016 at 9:07 am #100918

    I think I will contact her one last time, just cause I have to be certain of her feelings to move on. Should I do this via phone or text though? It’s been a month and I don’t know how smoothly a phone call would go. What would you suggest I say to her? Thanks!


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 23, 2016 at 9:07 am #100917

    I expected to spark a conversation with her after I sent her a text wishing her Happy Easter which she responded to in the same manner and never initiated something else. If she was interested wouldn’t she?

    I think I will contact her one last time, just cause I have to be certain of her feelings to move on. Should I do this via phone or text though? It’s been a month and I don’t know how smoothly a phone call would go. What would you suggest I say to her? Thanks again!


    WolfOG
    Participant
    May 23, 2016 at 5:12 pm #101103

    I would just text her and find out. Waiting around for something to happen won’t get you anywhere, so just go for it.


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 24, 2016 at 10:55 am #101165
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    Thank you guys for all the help and advice. I agree on all the good points you have made me aware of through your experiences and I will try to put them into good use. Unfortunately, I just saw theses posts so I didn’t use them all when I contacted her, but I felt like I should share with you an update, since you so kindly went out of the way to help me. I figured it would be rude not to.

    I sent her a message yesterday telling her I was thinking about her and I asked how she was doing. She responded she was doing well herself but still busy, mentioning here family issue (this time clarifying it was her grandmothers health). She also asked how I was doing. I then responded back wishing here grandmother well and proceeded to apologize for not getting in touch with her earlier due to some issues myself. I then emphasized that I didn’t forget her. She said it was OK and that she had personal affairs anyways, wishing me well on my own issues. I followed up by lightening the mood with a fun


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 24, 2016 at 10:57 am #101166
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    I followed up by lightening the mood with a funny remark about my job without her being around anymore (here internship had finished there) and she responded in the same funny tone. Finally I told her I would really like to see here again this week if she could find the time.

    Now I don’t like reading too much into text (that’s probably why it was better to call as you suggested) but her response was very short and I think it didn’t mirror my enthusiasm. She basically said “OK” and stopped the conversation by saying – in free translation from my language – “See ya!”. To tell you the truth I was just happy I set myself out there about my intentions and wasn’t really that bothered (after all she at least responded). So I just messaged back to her saying that whenever she finds the time she can text me and we can plan something. I then ended the conversation by wishing here a good evening. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I think it’s safe to say I shouldn’t wait to hear from here again.


    elmo3334
    Participant
    May 24, 2016 at 10:58 am #101167
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    I’m sure I’ve made many mistakes on my first attempt, but I hope I learn from them and proceed to make new ones…. just joking! Seriously though, I’m really glad I got out there and that I tried. This has been a great learning experience for me and thank you again guys for helping out.

    P.S. Any mistakes I made when texting here please feel free and point them out to me. I love learning!


    Themamguy
    Participant
    May 30, 2016 at 1:52 am #101610
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    Yes

    JarodOner
    JarodOner
    Participant
    May 30, 2016 at 5:47 pm #101619
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    Hop on it!

    Keep in touch with her more often than you think. Text her a couple times a week, sir.

    Not staying in contact will make HER think YOU’RE not interested and that’s not what you want.

    Shoot her fun and random texts here and there so she knows you’re thinking about her and didn’t forget her.

    That’s all it takes. So then the next time you say, “Hey… coffee tomorrow, you and me,” it’ll be easier for her to say “yes” than “no.”

    Glad you’re putting yourself out there. The more dates you go on, the easier it gets, mang.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by JarodOner JarodOner.

    Anonymous
    May 31, 2016 at 8:48 pm #101747
    Reply To: Should I call/text her after a month?

    good luck bro..

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