Should I or should I not?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Should I or should I not?

    Author
    Comments

  • GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 11, 2016 at 5:31 am #110963
    Should I or should I not?

    I’m a 20 year old man and she is 18. We’re both in college. So it starts with me meeting this girl on Tinder. After we matched I sent her a message and we started exchanging messages but I tried my best to reply a little later. On the third or fourth day I added her on Facebook. On that same day I asked her out. She took a long time to respond but I waited and she eventually said yes on the same day and I set the date to be on the day after.

    I took her to a really cool museum, had dinner and then watched a movie (My bad). I knew she was interested in me. She was close to me the whole date and she sometimes initiated contact but me in my stupidity didn’t move forward from that. When we were walking to get a cab so I could accompany her home (She lives with her family and I live with mine so I couldn’t go and hook up. It’s common in my country and I already got caught once so lockdown) I grabbed her hand but I noticed it was awkward so I let go.


    GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 11, 2016 at 5:32 am #110964

    After a few seconds she grabbed my hand and this lasted until we got into the cab. She let go when we got in. After a few minutes into the ride she gave me her phone and told me to put in my number which I did (Was this good or bad?). A good 20 minutes into the ride, I grabbed her hand and she moved closer to me. When I dropped her off at her place and they had an intimidating security guard so I couldn’t go in for the kiss (Weak of me I know). I opted for a hug and she gave me the cheek but me being a pussy didn’t kiss her cheek. I got in the cab and she texted me saying thank you and that she had a great time. I messaged her when I got home and we talked for about an hour until I left the house again at midnight.

    The next few days we kept exchanging texts but I noticed that I always initiated and that her interest was waning so what I did was I stopped texting her and lo and behold she initiated a few hours later. I answered her when I got home since I was in class.


    Damienishere
    Participant
    September 11, 2016 at 12:50 pm #110975

    Sounds like it’s going well to me. Just keep taking her out more and everything should be fine. 🙂


    GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 12, 2016 at 8:53 am #110965

    While she was out drinking with her friends one day she called me and I talked to her and her girlfriend which kept asking if I loved her friend which I replied “Not yet. We’re just friends but I’m interested in her”. She then told me about this guy that was hitting on her when they were drinking but she rejected him. After an hour of talking I told her I was busy and to have a great night. After a few more days of texting (it was getting slower but I was matching her texts ala 1:1 ratio) and I got back to initiating (My bad) I called her and told her we should hang out the day after tomorrow. She said “I’ll think about it” in which I interpreted as a no but I said “Okay”. The day before the set date she told me that she was going out to drink with her friends. She told me she would get ready and that she would message me when she met with her friends. Me being a little ticked off because she instantly joined her friends did a really late take back.


    GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 12, 2016 at 8:53 am #110966

    I said “Since you’re going to be drinking tonight I think we should cancel tomorrow. Have a great night” and I stopped messaging her. I put my phone away from me but it started occasionally buzzing for about 3-4 hours. I checked when I was done with what I was doing and boom: 2 messages and 12 phone calls. Me in shock decided to call her and ask her what’s up and she asked why I wasn’t answering in which I replied I was asleep (I was playing). She then said she would call me later and I said good bye. After a few minutes of me waking up she called me and asked me if I would like to go out that day in which I agreed to and set the time (3:00pm. I know) and place.

    This is where I fucked up. On our second date I was a little disinterested because it took her so long to respond to me asking her out but she agreed to go out with her friends in a heartbeat. I kept making mistakes and looking weak. We just had coffee and talked for 2-3 hours. She was still on her phone.


    GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 12, 2016 at 8:53 am #110967

    My biggest mistake was when we were parting ways. She said she was going to her bestfriend’s house to accompany her drinking cause she was the only girl there. I said okay and cut the date short. It was still early in the evening and I didn’t have much to do so I told her if she would allow me to accompany her to her friend place but she insisted that it would be such a hassle for me because only the residents of the dorm can enter and I would have to wait outside (If I only knew she was telling me to get lost). After bugging her (We were holding hands at this point) she said that I could but only half way there. During the commute to the half way point we were sitting close to each other. I had my arm around her and she her hand was on my thigh and she was leaning in to me. When we got to the halfway point we held hands and we proceeded to find her a bus but we got lost. I told her that since we can’t find a bus I could call a cab and bring her there. She hesitated but said okay.


    GeeItsLui
    Participant
    September 12, 2016 at 8:53 am #110969

    I thanked her and she thanked me back. She asked where I was and I said I was at a friend’s place. She said that it was far from where I lived and I didn’t reply anymore. After not texting her for about 2 days I said I was sorry for being so stubborn about waiting for her (Mistake?) in which she replied “It’s okay don’t be silly” and I sent her another message and she didn’t reply. After two days of waiting I texted her again so I didn’t text again. I decided to wait it out. It was hard at first but she messaged me 6 days after. She asked if I was mad which I ignored and asked her how she was doing. She said that she was busy with her thesis and school and that she was sorry. I asked her when she was free and she said she wasn’t sure because her schedule picked up. I told her to tell me when her schedule wasn’t tight and that I would love to see her. She didn’t reply after that. It’s been 3 days since that message.


    Manzi
    Participant
    September 14, 2016 at 6:01 pm #111448

    First of all, I think you took things too seriously. She was playing hard to get and tried to make you jealous by telling you about the flirty guy in the bar. Don’t get mad about silly stuff like her not texting you back right away.. Just play cool and don’t seem clingy you’ll be fine. Treat her as if she’s not the only one.. Don’t make it seem as if your world orbits around her. Go out with friends have fun and invite her to your gatherings. With time, I think you two will just get over the games you’re playing and just have a normal relationship.

    Cheers 🙂