Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

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Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    hopelessromantic012
    Participant
    June 1, 2016 at 11:26 pm #101925
    Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    i’ve like this girl since (let’s call her tiff) my sophomore of high school. I always used to hug tiff (long hugs). I used to bring snacks to class, and one day tiff asked me where is her snack? So every since then I brought an extra snack or juice to school. My junior year of high school, tiff best friend was talking in class and I over heard her say that tiff liked her. Even though I had information that she might be bi, I never told her how I felt( I was afraid she would laugh at me and tell everyone). Now (3 years after high school) tiffs in the navy and is stationed in Japan. Now I’m finally feeling brave enough to tell her how I feel, however I think tiff is dating some guy she’s stationed with. And to be honest feel like that should be me with her. However I feel like I should give up because she’s probably not leaving that guy and I missed my chance with her. Did she ever like me? don’t want to regret this. Did I ever Please any tips or ideas are welcomed. Thanks


    KittyCatty
    Participant
    June 2, 2016 at 1:00 pm #102021

    This is a tricky situation that all comes down to how strong of feelings you have for her and how how confident you are that she reciprocated those feelings. If she is in a relationship, it might be hard to talk to her about such intimate things. But this all depends on your previous relationship with her. However, I am a strong believer in being open and honest with people and clearing up the past, so I say go for it. If anything, you just get your feelings out there and feel better about it in the end, even if she doesn’t feel the same. Best of luck!


    hopelessromantic012
    Participant
    June 8, 2016 at 12:57 am #102435

    we never hung out together outside of school. the closes thing I could describe our relationship as cordial. like my sophomore year of high school, we had a class together and we would talk and sit by each other in class. after my sophomore year we didn’t have classes together until my senior year( she sat by me, help me cheat, talk etc,). it’s the same thing if I would run into her at the mall. I was thinking about logging on to one of my friends snapchat or asking one of my friends to go on snapchat to ask her what she always thought about me. hopefully she has few good words about me.:

    monicat8
    monicat8
    Participant
    June 8, 2016 at 2:09 am #102440

    For one, she will never know for sure how you feel unless you let her know. But telling her now that she is stationed abroad is not the best timing. She could see you as a wuss for not letting her know before. And worse yet if she doesn’t feel the same. I’d say be cool for now, and keep in touch. Long distance relationships are tough, not easy to sustain. But a solid friendship yes, which you would be able to thrive in and possibly develop further when she returns permanently. Meanwhile, you both are still young just 3 years out of high school, so live some more!


    Emsi
    Participant
    June 8, 2016 at 4:21 am #102449

    I am really one of these people who believes that assumption and fear kill more dreams than failure will ever do – There were times when people came out with their feelings and found out they were mutual all along. Others who weren’t so lucky but could at least close that chapter and move on… What you need is closure. So have that closure. Do it for yourself.


    Lauren
    Participant
    June 9, 2016 at 10:08 am #102569

    You will never know unless you tell her


    hopelessromantic012
    Participant
    June 9, 2016 at 11:34 am #102591

    We talk on social media, but every now and then. I think I’m going to tell her but I don’t know what to say. How would you start the conversation? Hey tiff, sorry it took 3 years, however, I just wanted to tell you I always had feelings for you… What do I say/end the conversation if she doesn’t feel the same? These last couple of days, this is all I’ve been thinking about, she’s all I’ve been thinking about. And I have no idea, what to do/say if she did or does have feelings for me? I often question myself, what do I have to offer? What can I say to her to let her know that I’m serious, and that I want to be there for her. But how do I say that without coming on too strong. Ugh, these thoughts.


    Aspiresubs
    Participant
    June 14, 2016 at 9:12 am #103337

    You should have told her how you felt about her 3 years ago and I feel like you may have missed your chance. But you should probably tell her how you feel about her now and don’t under-value yourself, you have a lot to offer.


    BlaiseSwordsman
    Participant
    June 16, 2016 at 12:14 pm #103485

    You should definitely tell her about your feelings in my opinion. 🙂


    alfa
    Participant
    June 18, 2016 at 3:36 pm #103590
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    I need some advice, the situation is not too complicated, I give indevidual english lessons in Spain, I am usually quite open about my sexuality to my clients if they mention how luck might be on my side and settle here with a man and I usually correct them and say I am into girls. It happens to be that one of my clients mentioned ex-girlfriend so I suppose she is a lesbian too. She said it causually but about two classes after I told her I am into girls.
    I found her attractive from the start, if I like someone I am usually quite up front about it, I don’t bother with the chasing game and if I get rejected oh well there are plenty more fish in the sea. But with this one I can’t act how I would normally act becuase she is my client, want some tips on how to attract her subtly, I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable as a client and I want to keep her as a client.


    icecream75002
    Participant
    June 21, 2017 at 2:39 pm #140178
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    I am in similar situation and it sucks. She also got a girlfriend right when i wanted to contact her after a year of not talking to eachother, hating myself for waiting too long. I wish i knew what is the best thing to do. (excuse my english)


    iWumbo360
    Participant
    June 22, 2017 at 12:12 pm #140314
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    I personally think you should always tell someone how you feel before giving up. Even though sometimes you may get 0 signs from someone to show that they are interested, you may be surprised when they reveal that they feel the same. The worst that they can say is no. It can be scary, but it’s worth the shot in my opinion.


    s111
    Participant
    July 5, 2017 at 5:51 am #141305
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    You should tell her


    BeckyLynn
    Participant
    August 21, 2017 at 12:52 am #146221
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    Honestly, I would tell her. You never know, she may feel the same way. The only way to know is to express how you feel towards her. The worst thing that can happen is she won’t feel the same but I think that’s better than living with regret.


    musichog
    Participant
    August 22, 2017 at 9:22 am #146409
    Reply To: Should I tell her how I feel? Or should I give up?

    Never hold back.. Tell her

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