Socially Deficient and Confused

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Socially Deficient and Confused

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    JohnX
    Participant
    December 2, 2013 at 5:58 pm #43743
    Socially Deficient and Confused

    Over the last month a cute girl has been sitting next to me in a big lecture hall almost every class, and we talk and work on in-class problems together. The few times I was about to ask her out to coffee, she seemed nervous and quickly said goodbye and walked away. Other times she seemed sad and reluctantly said goodbye after I said goodbye. I asked her once if she was busy later, and of course she was, because she had told me so 10 minutes earlier (7am class, no coffee), but she seemed even more sad this time.

    Today I asked her how her Thanksgiving was, and it was horrible. I didn’t pick up on how bad it was until I thought about what she said later (again 7am, no coffee), so I admit that just asking her to coffee after talking about my Thanksgiving wasn’t a terrific idea. She said that she had class all day and was really busy, but also seemed somewhat irritated. The semester is over in 1.5 weeks. I like her. I could use some advice. Is it OK to ask her out again? How?


    Anonymous
    December 7, 2013 at 11:36 pm #44187

    Be bold man!!! Women like men who go after what they want, regardless of how afraid they are. If she says no, no biggie! It will hurt for bit, but you will be okay! It’s nothing personal. Besides, class is almost over anyway. Have the strength to do whatever it is that you want to do, regardless of your fears. This is a life long skill that you will need to develop anyway, so you might as well develop and practice it now! So grab your fear by the cajones and take control. YOU decide what you want, don’t let your fear decide for you! Good luck!

    erikmay
    erikmay
    Participant
    December 17, 2013 at 8:45 am #44689

    Are you as timid with her as I would probably be? I am always afraid to be blunt and to the point, which I am finding out send some negative vibes. You could ask her if she is interested in going to coffee sometime, or if you pushing too much. The answer should tell you if she is interested and just busy, or not interested.

    I know my answer is not that great. I am trying to find some lessons to help me gain confidence and become a better communicator with women.

    George Reagan
    George Reagan
    Participant
    April 7, 2014 at 6:24 pm #44323

    I agree with Ms Goodrich. Ask her out and be direct about it. If she says yes – awesome. If she says no, at least there are no ambiguities and you can move on.