This is the most complicated situation I have gotten myself into…please help.

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This is the most complicated situation I have gotten myself into…please help.

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    FarahAbbas
    Participant
    February 12, 2017 at 5:31 am #126591
    This is the most complicated situation I have gotten myself into…please help.

    Background
    We met online through a common friend. This guy is a mix of good and bad. Irresistable! He is in the same industry as me.
    We have not met yet – just been texting. Late at night. When hes out he still messages. He has confessed that he really likes me, wants to get to know me better and oh boy does he flirt…he just wont stop. I have told him I find it annoying and get shy. He still does to tease me.
    He is a good person. Actually cares and all. Sweet family.

    Problem:
    Girls are after him. He is a newbie DJ. So you can imagine. Even though when he is out at his gigs mixing..he messages.
    I cant be with him as I will always be insecure and I might end up making his life hell. I am not ok with his profession but I also am not someone who will tell him not to do what he loves.
    Problem is I think I am falling for him. But i cant start something I wont be able to finish and definately wont be happy with him. I dont like his friends either.

    What do I do?

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    February 12, 2017 at 1:41 pm #126607

    you need to start the process of letting him go as any potential partner (b/c you are right – you aren’t going to change him nor should you… he’s probably not going to give up DJ’ing for you – nor should he).

    so either let it be a nice innocent distant fantasy to be playful with.
    or stop being in contact at all with him.

    there is no relationship here unless you just want a casual fantasy fling with him.


    sea2002
    Participant
    February 14, 2017 at 12:24 am #126840

    I think if you met you might find that you do not like him after all. I have texted people and talked on the phone a lot only to find out that in person I really had no desire to see them again. I enjoyed the friendship we had but to start a relationship would be weird.

    Now, you could also meet and say wow I like him more than I thought and in that case, it shouldn’t matter who his friends are. I think you should at least go on a date with him and see how it goes.