Toxic Girl

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Toxic Girl

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    bigtuna49
    bigtuna49
    Participant
    May 13, 2014 at 4:00 pm #52768
    Toxic Girl

    I know this girl is toxic, but I just want to hear what you have to say.
    I was talking to this girl for about a month. She was very flakey and not very attentive but she did flirt.

    Took her out on a date, thought it went well. Texted her the next day about it. Never received a response. Little bummed about it, so for closure, i sent her a message three to four days later and said..

    “Hey, no hard feelings. I apologize for jumping the gun (realized i had kissed her a little too soon) and making you feel awkward. Best of luck to you. take care.”

    She immediately replied with “? um Sorry I didn’t text you right back? I had a really busy weekend and last day of school. but okay.”

    I already can tell what she’s trying to do here, taking the blame off of herself for never texting me back and making me look the crazy person.

    Am I right?

    I didn’t message her back. I am not feeding her any more ammo to knock me down.


    Kobrun
    Participant
    May 13, 2014 at 7:40 pm #52796

    The problem with texts – and emails too for that matter – is that you can not hear voice inflection … and that is key and can lead to misunderstandings. Always better to talk and even better to see the person to gauge their body language. The text itself doesn’t mean she’s toxic but it’s obvious something made you feel that. The rule I live by – and this does not just apply to dating – is I always trust my instincts. Always. And when I’m unsure, I follow up to make sure.

    loveanonymousstyle
    loveanonymousstyle
    Participant
    May 13, 2014 at 9:30 pm #52801

    Definitely trust your instincts, just be sure that’s what they are. I have composed a text more than a few times and neglected to hit send. Sometimes you have to give people the benefit of the doubt. You said you thought things went well. Why not try a second date to be sure…you really have nothing to lose.

    LoveAnonymousStyle


    heather4051
    Participant
    May 14, 2014 at 10:48 pm #52902

    I mean, I do sometimes forget to text people back because I do get easily busy and distracted, but if it’s someone that I really, really like and want to work things out with, I’ll contact them in any way and time possible. Usually if I’m not that into them I’ll just kind of let them know in the best way possible, but not ignoring them because that’s rude. Not really sure what this chic is up to. You could be right about the turning around the blame thing, it’s been done. I think you should just go with your intuition and instincts on this one. If it doesn’t feel positive, don’t do it.


    Deedee
    Participant
    May 15, 2014 at 10:04 am #52916

    As kobrun said that with texting you don’t know how they said it and may take it the wrong way, but from a females perspective it was a way for her to put the blame of her not messaging you back on yourself as she doesn’t have the guts to admit it herself.

    bigtuna49
    bigtuna49
    Participant
    May 15, 2014 at 10:49 am #52934

    As kobrun said that with texting you don’t know how they said it and may take it the wrong way, but from a females perspective it was a way for her to put the blame of her not messaging you back on yourself as she doesn’t have the guts to admit it herself.

    What would happen if I called her out on it?