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featherwinkParticipantDecember 20, 2015 at 6:47 pm #90342
I’ve tried various methods of meeting people online and have found the flake to normal-person ratio is something like 25 to 1. And I’m not even at 25 flakes yet (because I live in a small town), so that’s just an optimistic guess! By the way, I’m just saying “normal-person” to refer to anyone who’s not a flake, my definition of ‘normal’ is extremely broad:)…I’d love to know what your experience says the ratio is?!
I realize it’s a numbers game: my mom’s partner (who she met online) says you have to go on 56 dates before you find something worthwhile. That’s an overwhelming number of messages and texts and phone calls, not to mention dates. So my second question is: how do you keep the faith through this seemingly extreme ‘vetting’ process?!?!
lesorphelinsParticipantJanuary 5, 2016 at 12:49 am #90992
It’s hard to answer definitively, but here are some things to consider:
– Fake profiles are common, especially on free dating sites. These fake profiles are typically made by scammers in Russia, China or Africa who try to connect with singles and con them into sending money. Paid dating sites like Match, Zoosk, and eHarmony all do a better job of blocking these scammers (compared to POF and OK Cupid).
– Dormant accounts are very common: most online daters create accounts to check out online dating, then stop using the accounts at some point – either because they start a relationship or because they are not successful. Their profiles never get deleted (unless, of course, the users themselves ask for deletion) and keep appearing in search results for at least some time. They are not fake, they are not flakes, but they are useless. This is especially problematic if you don’t use one of the top five dating sites: in the US, Match, Zoosk, eHarmony, POF, and OK Cupid.
lesorphelinsParticipantJanuary 5, 2016 at 12:57 am #90993
– For paid sites, consider that users must be subscribers in order to reply to messages. If you send a message to a non-subscriber, you will likely not receive a reply. On the other hand, subscribers are paying and therefore are more serious and have an incentive to communicate and write back.
– Zoosk has a nice feature called photo verification, which allows users to have their profile pic verified by the service: while that doesn’t guarantee a reply, it does at least guarantee that the profile you see is real, and that the photo is accurate.
– Most dating sites are simply too small and don’t have enough matches. Again – stick to one of the ones I have named above (Match being the largest – scale has its advantages).
– After you’ve secured a date through an online dating site, you will probably have the same chances for success that you get offline.
dirtyjerseyParticipantJanuary 12, 2016 at 1:36 pm #91447
There are a lot of flakes both ways, from conversation to date yeah 1 to 20 easily.
djamesParticipantFebruary 23, 2016 at 5:36 pm #94207
If it takes you 25 people to meet a single person you connect with, those other 25 weren’t meant to be.
limichelle33ParticipantFebruary 25, 2016 at 11:21 pm #94470
It took me many tries on eharmony and match and I either got people only wanting to hook up or you know not interested. I realized then I was for me personally needing a dating site specific to my needs. So I searched and there I found my guy whom I’m meeting in April, been talking for almost five months. It’s a LDR relationship.
So I think you have to either try at the numbers game for awhile but don’t give up.
I got rejected 25 times!
Those matches were definitely not meant to be.
peaches12ParticipantMarch 3, 2016 at 10:14 pm #94951
I’ve had a similar experience with various online-dating apps and sites. I’ve found only about 1 in 10 messages turns into a date. I had to go on 7 dates before I found someone I was at all interested in seeing again. Online dating certainly takes patience and perseverance. I figure it’s worth putting in the effort if it eventually leads to a relationship.
teamsconParticipantMarch 4, 2016 at 10:50 am #94968
Depends on u like everything else.
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