what should I do?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

what should I do?

    Author
    Comments

  • Cutebutpsycho
    Participant
    October 11, 2016 at 11:33 am #113758
    what should I do?

    Hi. Id like to start by thanking anyone for taking their time to respond to this.
    The problem is that I don’t know what my problem is. Im nice to everyone, I smile, laugh, try to make jokes and keep an overall positive attitude yet every time someone gets the chance to insult me, they take it. And it is not even the people who know me the best (usually guys but also girls).
    They call me names like fat or too thin (different people) , ugly and others even though I cannot say I fall into those categories. Im rather plain-faced and thin also. I try to have nice conversations with everyone but no one wants to even hear what I have to say. I just don’t know what to do to change this. How can Respond to these hurtful comments that are addressed to me, someone who always tries to make others feel good about themselves?


    MiniMogal
    Participant
    October 16, 2016 at 6:41 pm #114238

    I’m really sad to hear this. Unfortunately,you can’t control what other people do or say. The only thing you can change is how you react and respond.
    Firstly, please be mindful of the way you project yourself to others. You’ve chosen to call yourself “Cutebutpsycho”. I don’t know anything about you but I’m sure you aren’t psycho. Even if you were, it’s not a positive thing to say about yourself. Be kind to yourself. Some years ago, I was a shy person who struggled with self-esteem but I’ve learned that even if you think you are a horrible person, you should never speak ill of yourself because, all it does is allow others to speak ill of you. When you say something bad about yourself, it gives people authority to say it about you too because, they subconsciously think, “Well, if that’s what you think of yourself, then it’s okay if I think of you that way as well’.


    MiniMogal
    Participant
    October 16, 2016 at 6:47 pm #114239

    Every time someone says something nasty to you, simply visualize a large red button with the word “IGNORE” on it and visualize pressing it and erasing ever hearing the nasty comment and then never think about it again. This exercise will help you to focus on the good and positive things you and others thinks about you, rather than the negative.

    Lastly,there will always be negative. Nobody is universally liked, just never let it take over.


    Hani
    Participant
    October 17, 2016 at 12:03 am #114247

    try to know more about what the others like
    try listening to the music that everyone else is listening to
    or try to watch popular tv shows
    the key is to talk about interesting topics