What should I do next

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What should I do next

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    August 30, 2014 at 8:35 pm #60452
    What should I do next

    Ok Iv known this girl for awhile and I really like her so 2 weeks ago today I asked her out on a date I’m a little shy so on the first one I did not talk a lot but we have been on three dates and on the last one I started warming up to her a little and a few days after our last date she told me that she still likes her ex I know that they have been broke up for about 4 months and they only dated for about 4 months do you think she is telling the truth or just rejecting me??? I do not want to give up on her because it’s very very rare that I find a girl that I like and iv never started out liking a girl this much she is my perfect match we share the same interest and she is perfect in my eyes so I’m not ready to call it over I know by saying that you may think I smothered her but I’m pretty sure I didn’t i really bad want her back so what should I do next by the way I’m 20 and she is 18

    August 30, 2014 at 8:54 pm #60453

    And when she told me she said she still wants to be friends


    aimeesquash
    Participant
    August 31, 2014 at 5:18 am #60455

    You need to ask her honestly if what she’s looking for is a genuine relationship or just someone to patch her wounds and make her feel more confident.

    September 2, 2014 at 8:47 am #60457

    Ok thanks and something else I met her threw racing that is one of our interest we are both big into racing and there is a big race tomorrow night should I ask her if she wants to go with me as friends???

    September 2, 2014 at 8:47 am #60458

    I’m so confused on this I do not want to end up in the friend zone with her should I leave her alone for awhile or be friends with her and hope it grows into something more iv already told her I wish we could give it more time and I told her that I want to be friends and maybe it can grow into something more I don’t want to seem to despret I just don’t know what to do

    dmj106
    dmj106
    Participant
    September 2, 2014 at 8:47 am #60461

    I don’t feel like I’d throw in the towel on the potential of a relationship quite yet, but you definitely need to talk with her about where her loyalty lies. Express to her how you personally feel towards her and let her decide from there what she wants.

    dmj106
    dmj106
    Participant
    September 2, 2014 at 8:47 am #60462

    I think that you need to be very up front with this girl. Let her know exactly how you feel about her and then let her decide what she wants out of the relationship. I wouldn’t give up on it yet, but it’s gonna come down to where her loyalty lies with you and her ex.


    awkwardsaurus
    Participant
    September 2, 2014 at 8:04 pm #60554

    Given the age difference, I would evaluate where the two of you are in your lives. Do you think there’s a different level of emotional maturity between you? Are either of you in college, on a career path, etc? Furthermore, what do you think she wants out of a relationship versus what you want? Do you feel like you’re a replacement for her ex, or are you your own person? As I suspect the latter to be true, I think you may want to consider why she may be drawn to her ex, and how it may relate how she sees you. I’m not saying to become him, naturally: in fact, that might be a terrible idea. All I’m saying is to look at the problem from all angles, and use that information to determine if your efforts are worth it.


    blah blah 445
    Participant
    September 2, 2014 at 10:13 pm #60558

    I don’t believe you should give up on her for sure. If that’s the way you really feel for her never give up there is always a chance. Be honest with her in every way and she should give you another chance I’m sure it will take time for her to get over her ex though.