What to do?


What to do?

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    April 4, 2018 at 2:43 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

    Hey DatingAdvice.com forum readers! Just a quick heads up that a few dating sites are offering a FREE trial to DatingAdvice forum readers. Try it now and meet local singles in just a few minutes! Here are the sites:

    Site Who You'll Meet Today's Deal
    Match.com Casual dating for ages 18-65 Get FREE access
    Elite Singles Educated professionals 25 and older Get FREE access
    AFF.com Hookups, casual encounters Get FREE access

    What are you waiting for? One mouse click could be all that stands between you and your next romance!

    October 25, 2016 at 1:07 pm #115252
    What to do?

    So, I’ve been dating this guy I met online for about 4 months. The relationship has progressed pretty far, but I have some concerns. First concern is that he looks at a lot of nude photos and porn. Haven’t really addressed that with him yet, but it is starting to bother me. The other concern is that he is into some soft core BDSM. Nothing over the top, just some spanking, toys, binding the hands and feet, blindfolding and a few other things without getting too graphic. I was ok with trying out new things, but my concern is that I am a grown woman and this is not something I want for the rest of my life. I don’t have a problem with experimenting, and adding some spice to the bedroom, but this may be too much. Not sure how to handle it. Is it wrong for me to ask him to leave these things behind? Or should I just move on and find a relationship that is more my speed? Keep in mind that this guy is super nice and very caring and attentive.

    October 25, 2016 at 3:50 pm #115291

    Make some questions….
    how important is it to him, when did he start liking it… Maybe you ll take some answers about how deep is this before asking him to stop it.
    Maybe he still thinks sex is a game, how old is he?
    Can you tell if he’s in love with you or at least has a crush on you?
    Did you ever give him the choice of something different or just followed his way from the beginning?
    Sex is important in a relationship, if you can’t stand it, you can’t be happy.

    And a worst scenario, not all the girls accept BDSM, maybe that’s why he’s keeping you and he’s being nice, caring and attentive????
    If he’s really nice and caring he will understand!
    Find out!

    October 25, 2016 at 5:39 pm #115323

    He’s over 50 and has been into the BDSM for about 2 years. Yes he is in love with me. It is not something that we do every time we have sex, but it is something that we engage in regularly. I think maybe you’re right, I need to address this with him and see what his reaction is to my problems with it.

    October 26, 2016 at 1:40 am #115330

    just tell him that you dont want to do this stuff forever and see how he reacts. he probably will be okay with it.