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NotSoILieParticipantNovember 25, 2013 at 12:45 am #43356
So in a true case of gender role reversal, I have quite the funny situation going on here. I have a friend, whom I like as a friend, is reasonably attractive, but imo completely incompatible from a relationship standpoint (aka she’s been friendzoned).
Long story short, last week, she asked if I wanted to catch dinner or a movie this weekend. I picked movie, since that cold be construed as just a ‘between friends’ type thing, and when we went to the movie, I treated it exactly the way I would when going with a group of friends (didn’t offer to pay for her ticket, didn’t hold doors, etc), but tonight she asked if I’m available on Tuesday night. I’m not; I have a real first date with someone planned then.
So what do you think is best?
A) Say I’m busy on Tuesday night
B) Say I’m on a date Tuesday night
C) Say I’m busy, and that I think we’re great friends, but I don’t think a relationship between us would work out.
badgerstatedudecoreParticipantNovember 26, 2013 at 2:38 am #43504
Just be honest with her on what’s going on. Better she’s for a while rather than get thinking something else
multidParticipantNovember 26, 2013 at 10:59 am #43512
Tell her you have a date Tuesday night. She will be miffed for a while but will get over it.
AnonymousNovember 26, 2013 at 12:26 pm #43537
Tell her you have a date Tuesday night. Don’t confuse the poor girl. Otherwise she might think that you two have something.
Also, you don’t want to embarass her by saying you feel nothing for her.. So option B is the best one:)
NotSoILieParticipantApril 7, 2014 at 6:19 pm #43357
I should add that I’m trying to let her down in as nice a way as possible
girlygrlParticipantMay 20, 2014 at 1:56 am #53265
Tell her you have a date. Girls don’t want to play games.
skzamanParticipantMay 20, 2014 at 6:38 am #53274
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MamichiquitaParticipantMay 20, 2014 at 2:22 pm #53330
C is the best answer
AnonymousMay 21, 2014 at 12:34 am #53362
I think C is the best answer and please say it nicely, and one more thing even if you are not on a real date still open the door for her and respect her like you want your mother or your girl to be respected. okay, treat every lady like a real lady even if you don’t like her because that is what a real gentleman would do.
SeVenSoldiersParticipantMay 21, 2014 at 12:21 pm #53404
I say C as well. It’s best to be upfront and real about it. Don’t carry her
brunetteParticipantMay 21, 2014 at 11:01 pm #53504
THE PERFECT PLAN:
1. Say you’re busy, do not tell her you’re going on a date because that would absolutely crush her. Also don’t make it awkward by explaining that you don’t want a relationship, because she may not like you. So if you say that, then things will be extremely uncomfortable.
2. Set her up with a guy, one of the friends in your “guy group” or someone at work. This will help ease her out of liking you. (Ex. If a child wants ice cream, but that parent doesn’t want to give the kid ice cream, they could offer a small cookie or a smoothie so the kid won’t feel totally let down)
**are you POSITIVE she likes you? Has she told you how she feels?**
ALSO, it doesn’t matter if you’re on a date or not, holding the door for a girl is just the right thing to do, it’s polite. You can show her respect without leading her on.
PrincessKaseyParticipantMay 21, 2014 at 11:50 pm #53506
Tell her it’s a date- but also tell her you will need her advice after the date – since she is a girl and your friend- make sure she knows she still serves a role as a friend in your life.
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