September 13, 2016 at 4:22 pm #111294
OK, so one of my coworkers has been really confusing me lately. I’ve already asked her out and she said no emphatically, so I didn’t try again. She has a BF (she claims, but then admits he’s a wiener and leaves no reason why she should even consider him). We’re still good friends despite that, though.
So yesterday we were walking off work, and my phone chimed. Naturally I pulled it out of my pocket and read it. Then she asks me if that’s “another” GF, and I replied “so what if it is”.
Eventually this lead to a pretty good conversation…about our exes. We had each other cracking up with horror stories. She admitted that most if not all her exes were complete morons (and even implied her current BF in that mix). One of which was even gay (don’t ask me how that works)
I can tell she likes me to some extent. She finds excuses to meet with me and draws them out as far as possible, touches me “accidentally”, does this crazy contradiction thing, etc etc
So girls: what do I believe? Thx.
RosenkavalierParticipantSeptember 17, 2016 at 1:42 am #111737
Are you seeking a relationship with her? If so, I would pass. The fact that she hates all her exes suggests either a vindictive and malignant personality or terrible judgment. But who knows, could be fun becoming her next ‘bad ex’, maybe she’ll write a song about you and you’ll become famous?
CoconuttyParticipantSeptember 19, 2016 at 8:44 am #111775
Hate to make us sound like assholes but we are (women) and a lot of women like myself like to be wanted. She probably doesnt want you to stop desiring her because it feels good but if shes not leaving her man thats what you are to her. A confidence boost hes clearly slacking at.
josephddiazzParticipantSeptember 20, 2016 at 8:45 am #111889
I wouldn’t recommend relationships at work, when they fail or get complicated it is always a mess that backfires… but aside from that, if she wasn’t your co worker i would tell you that you just need to continue being a “friend” and i guess make things that will make her feel drawn to you, the same way you would with any other woman you would be interested in. Just small things that you know she would appreciate, not necessarily towards her but maybe your behavior.
cameron8500ParticipantSeptember 22, 2016 at 7:35 pm #112246
You may end up as the next bf with issues. To create more feelings you should try not being so available (30 days). After 30 days the scarcity will have you being a different person. But be careful with co-workers it can get weird. Many of my co- workers are married to others at my job- not a bad thing just be sure you can handle if things go south.
coldturkeyParticipantSeptember 27, 2016 at 7:55 pm #112669
Leave her alone.Obviously she wants attention because she’s in a bad relationship and instead of having the guts to end it with that person..she wants to vent to you about it and flirt with you.If or when she does leave that guy…don’t date her.She seems to choose horrible guys to be with…that’s something to do within herself.Just stay being her friend.October 10, 2016 at 4:47 pm #113700
Thank you all for the comments! Unfortunately things seem to have taken a turn for the worse. She’s had 3 panic attacks in 3 weeks, at least that I saw, there may have been more. She seems to be scared of me but I’m not sure why. It seems she got a new phone so I wouldn’t have her number anymore. She’s got yet another BF, this one is new in town and friends with one of her exes that tried to grope her, and just for the record this guy beat up her brother…and supposedly now they’re friends. (WTF…)
The ex that tried to grope her recently tried 3 times, even waiting for her at home.
Something is obviously bugging her and she keeps telling me it’s “nothing”. When she told me that today, she was blushing. Things escalated, and she accused me of “touching her”, implying that it was inappropriate…thing is I never touched her below the shoulders.
She accused me of “being too pushy” as well, thing is there I was SUGGESTING things. I never forced her to do anything.
minnesota960125ParticipantOctober 10, 2016 at 8:59 pm #113715
She seems confused and I find it hard to believe all of her ex’s were the problems. Pass on her.October 11, 2016 at 9:04 am #113703
They were minor things like apps on our phones I would send her, or a music album…certainly not forcing her into anything.
Oh, and the guy that tried to grope her? Not only is his She’s trying to get a date with him, and she hinted it was to spite me.
I’m most definitely going to move on from her, but if she keeps going down this road she’s going to get hurt or even killed. She’s got more exes than fingers and toes, and most if not all of them should be in prison.
I want to help her, but I’m pretty much at a loss of how to deal with it. You’d have to see it to believe it, I can’t do it justice in a few paragraphs.
She needs to be saved from herself.
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