Why so many fail at online dating…

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Why so many fail at online dating…

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    Attrit
    Participant
    January 27, 2016 at 11:55 am #92281
    Why so many fail at online dating…

    I pop into this forum from time to browse a few posts, I wanted to take a minute and really simplify this whole online dating thing for people.

    First, online dating is simply a tool and not every tool is right to fix every problem. In your case, especially if you have so many gripes and repeat failures, you need to come to the realization that it is not the right tool for the job.

    Second, every problem, gripe, complaint, negative observation, etc. is not a problem with online dating or other people, but with directly YOU.

    I have tons of fun at online dating (I also have a strict policy never to message anyone), I log on, make a profile, receive messages within a few hours, have some great conversations, and then meetup with people. It’s pretty straight forward and simple. Clearly, for me, it is the right tool.

    Online dating first revolves around your visual appearance, it really can be a playground for good looking people and a hell for those who are not.


    hooligan.rony
    Participant
    January 27, 2016 at 12:25 pm #92286

    you are 100% right with my point of view …:)


    blackheart
    Participant
    February 5, 2016 at 12:22 pm #92993

    goood


    razaulk66556
    Participant
    February 5, 2016 at 12:27 pm #92995

    Thanks for your good advise.


    Rami
    Participant
    February 7, 2016 at 1:39 am #93088

    Most of them cheaters

    F. A. L.
    F. A. L.
    Participant
    February 7, 2016 at 3:12 am #93091

    Profiles: I agree pictures, good smiling ones are important. Two pictures, at the very least. I like when guys mix it up with candid pictures, action pictures, funny and maybe one selfie. Professional, studio shots, shirtless guys, guys trying to show off their abs, their motorcycles or their sportscars turn me off big time.

    I think you will have success if you are humble, unique and can spell. Humble meaning don’t go on and on about your work, cars, world traveler or how smart your kids are. Talk about you and what makes you unique. More is better to me. I can’t stand it when someone doesn’t take the time to give me a couple of paragraphs about themselves. And be unique, not cliche: I want to gag when I hear the words ‘cuddle, love to hold hands, spoil that special lady, or bla, bla, bla’. And take another 2 minutes to spell check. If you really have a college degree we won’t believe it if you are not somewhat articulate and can’t spell most words.


    Anonymous
    February 7, 2016 at 7:38 am #93109

    Nice .


    D3gan6
    Participant
    February 8, 2016 at 12:48 am #93133

    You’re absolutely right. You can preach to no end on a dating site that you’re basically everything he or she looks for in a S.O but if you don’t look like atleast a 7 or 8, they won’t waste their time on you. Sad


    JacobRoberts1992
    Participant
    February 8, 2016 at 3:08 pm #93174
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    I would also add that people tend to lump “online dating” together under one big category, when in reality almost all the sites are different. For example, Tindr might be all wrong for you, but Coffee Meets Bagel might be a perfect fit. Each online dating website is a specific, individualized tool, and its worth exploring all of them. Some people only try one site and then give up, which is too bad.


    aaron007
    Participant
    February 13, 2016 at 1:01 am #93505
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    Why they fail? It’s because they lack of patience. They think that joining a dating site could easily find them a partner.. Online Dating is for meeting new people and make new friends. But there are different types of people online.. Some are genuine and some are fake. Some are friendly and you can get along so well. But some are rude and try to discriminate. So you just have to find someone that you can get along so well. Someone who has the same interests as you. Someone who can understands you. Online Dating is a vast world. You just have to find the right people for you. You just need to have a self-restraint.. I am sure you will find someone for you.


    Bro1993
    Participant
    February 13, 2016 at 6:54 am #93508
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    I always had fails and fails


    moveonfindtheone
    Participant
    February 15, 2016 at 9:09 am #93520
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    I find the idea of online dating being very a visual, and looks orientated rather worrying.

    I think its good and healthy to find some common ground first before you meet, to find out that you share the same core values.because without these the relationship has no basis or grounding on which to further develop.

    …And that’s why online dating probably fails for most.


    myplanc
    Participant
    February 15, 2016 at 9:16 am #93565
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    My opinion. There are those who use online dating for very different reasons. Some don’t have their crap together and are desperate. “If only I could meet someone nice I’m sure my life would turn around”. Scary, you know who you are. Then there are those that do have their act together and see it for what it is, a great way to meet people, it is.

    I’m at a loss when I look at some profiles, especially on paying sites. How could anyone post a profile without photos. Then there are those who post nothing but lame selfies in their sweats. Seriously?

    News flash. Men and women are usually attracted to each other first based on visual appearances. Sometimes it doesn’t take much. Comb your hair, put on something nice, and have a friend take a few shots. You are ABSOLUTELY clueless if you think otherwise. You must put on your best face.

    Finally this will come across as very harsh, sorry. If you are visibly overweight you are in for a serious challenge with online dating. Reality.


    BDK91
    Participant
    February 16, 2016 at 9:04 am #93675
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    My experience with online dating was of course like most not postive . You could write the most thoughtfuland kindest email and no one would ever respond. I wrote many, many people. To me, it’s basically just like playing a game.

    Richy Rich
    Richy Rich
    Participant
    March 28, 2016 at 9:41 am #96530
    Reply To: Why so many fail at online dating…

    Can I get peoples on opinions as to how long you should message people before asking to meet up? I simply will not message for weeks on end, this runs the risk of burnout and nothing to say if eventually meeting. If I message someone after , say 15 messages and I say something like “Shall we grab a drink one night? Let me know when your free”. And if they dither shall I then just move onto the next one?

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