How Gay Men Can Introduce a Date to the Family
|Sam Stieler • 8/03/12|
Introducing one of your dates to your family and friends is a big deal, and it is certainly worth getting excited about. After all, it isn’t that common you meet someone you want to actually get to know beyond date number two, let alone someone you want to actually bring around the people you care most about.
Introducing a man to your friends and family essentially sends a big signal that you expect and want this person to become a greater part of your life and that you expect him to stick around for something approximating “the long haul.”
Because it’s such a big deal, it’s a good idea to introduce your date to your loved ones in the right way.
First of all…
Before you introduce your new man to your friends and family, you need to first be absolutely sure he’s someone you like and someone you want to continue seeing indefinitely and make a relatively serious part of your life.
If you aren’t sure about this man, don’t introduce him to your friends and family. When you introduce a man to your loved ones, and then you end things with that man soon after, you will feel embarrassed and your friends and family will be confused.
Repeat this cycle often enough and your loved ones will not only get annoyed and frustrated with you, but they will also stop taking it seriously whenever you say you met someone you care a lot about.
Save yourself and your loved ones these potential hassles and make sure you really like a guy before the two of you do the rounds.
“No matter what, take a slow, gradual approach to
introducing your man to your friends and family.”
Bring him to your friends first.
As a general rule, you want to integrate your man into your social circle before you introduce him to your family. It’s a good idea to use your friends as something of a “test run” before bringing him to your siblings and your parents.
Introducing your man to your friends first serves a couple purposes. Primarily, it lets you ease your man into your personal life rather than thrusting him front and center.
Taking this gradual approach will help you and your man feel comfortable about the pace your relationship is progressing at. Slowing down the process will help reduce stage fright and minimize embarrassment and damage to your reputation if things don’t go exactly as planned.
The easiest way to introduce your man to your friends is to simply bring him along to a social event. This is low pressure because it won’t feel like the spotlight is on him. It will feel like he’s just part of the group hanging out.
If your man is shy, then bring him to a small social event, like a brunch or drinks with a couple close friends, so he will know some of your friends a little better before you thrust him into a big party where you already know everyone.
Then comes your family.
By contrast, it’s generally a better idea to introduce your man to a small number of your family members before you bring him along to a big outing where all the cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents and great grandparents will have their say.
Introduce your man to your parents or your siblings in a casual manner at first, such as if he’s picking you up from their house or through some other occurrence where they can meet, shake hands and talk for just a couple of minutes.
Only after a couple of these occasions is it a good idea to have him over for dinner or some other more focused, higher pressure and longer lasting event.
No matter what, take a slow, gradual approach to introducing your man to your friends and family. Don’t feel in a rush. If he’s really as great as you believe him to be, he’ll be sticking around for some time.