eHarmony is no new name to the dating industry — most of us have seen the commercials and/or recognize Co-Founder Dr. Neil Clark Warren, or know someone who’s used the site.
Since eHarmony has been around since 2000, the site has figured out the perfect formula for helping singles find love — most of it having to do with putting all the work on its shoulders. But why not make a good thing even better? We’ve compiled a list of tips that will be like adding the cherry on top of your eHarmony sundae.
eHarmony Signup Tips (#1-2)
eHarmony has one of the most in-depth registration processes of any dating site, but don’t let that scare you. It’s not scary and it won’t take up a lot of your time — it’s fun! Whether you’re using a desktop, laptop, smartphone, or tablet, we’ll walk you through how to fly through the signup without missing a beat.
1. Get a Free Membership Via Desktop & Mobile
Registering for eHarmony starts by going to the homepage, iTunes, or Google Play. From there, you’ll choose your gender. If you select the man icon, the Seeking A section will automatically select the woman icon. Then you can type in your first name and zip code, select your country, and provide your email address and password. This will create a basic free membership that is open to heterosexual singles over 18 and is good for the rest of your life.
Not only does this membership allow you to register for free — but it also allows you to take the 29 Dimensions® of Compatibility Matching Questionnaire, receive a personality assessment, send virtual winks, get match suggestions sent to your inbox, and message with matches during special events and holidays.
2. Take Your Time
eHarmony’s very own questionnaire consists of about 150 questions. While you don’t have to answer them all, we’d highly recommend it. You want the best matches possible, right? It’ll probably take you about an hour to complete, so set aside some time where you won’t be distracted.
Topics range from lifestyle habits to the best words to describe yourself and how strongly you agree or disagree with certain statements. You can learn more about the kinds of questions eHarmony asks here.
eHarmony Tips for Your Profile (#3-6)
All of the information you provide during the questionnaire part will appear on your profile, but there are other sections of your profile that you want to go over with a fine-tooth comb as well. Here are a few ways to make it shine like a new penny!
3. Beware of Typos & Grammar Errors
Few things will blow your chances with an online match than grammar and spelling mistakes. Think you can get away with one or two? Think again. The writing enhancement platform Grammarly says if you’re a guy, you’ll be 14% less likely to get a response.
If you have a family member, friend, or colleague with a good eye, ask them to look over your profile for you. It’s also worth using tools like Grammarly — most of them are free!
4. Get Creative With Your Photos
Uploading one photo to your profile is basically telling potential matches “This is all you need to know about me, and if this one thing doesn’t catch your eye, feel free to move on.” Obviously, I mean figuratively, not literally, but either way, why would you want to do that? You’ve got one-tenth of a second to make a good impression, and one photo probably isn’t going to do it.
We’d recommend uploading at least four: a portrait, a full-body shot, an action photo, and something quirky. Choosing your favorites could be something fun to do with your friends. If you don’t have a lot of photos of yourself, check out companies like LookBetterOnline, which boasts that it can help you get four times more attention on your profile.
5. Be Detailed But Succinct
I know you love traveling, trying new foods, hanging out with your family, friends, and pets, and watching movies and TV, but it’s important to be find ways to stand out in your profile because practically everyone else in the world loves these things, too.
It’s OK to mention these typical interests, but you should also provide a little bit more information that only applies to you. For example, “I’m a big travel junkie because my dad was in the armed services, so I never stayed anywhere for too long. It was great getting to live in different cities and experience different cultures, and I still enjoy doing that today.”
On the flip side, you’ll want to keep it brief (remember that one-tenth of a second). Think about how you read things online — you probably scan most of it, right? People do the same thing on dating profiles, so if you write what seems like a Proust novel, you’re going to lose your readers.
6. Keep It Fresh
When you’re a new eHarmony member, you’ll receive a lot of attention because you’re starting with a clean slate. One way to maintain this momentum is to keep your profile looking so fresh and so clean, clean (just as Outkast would expect you to).
Switch some photos out, reword some of your profile or add new details, expand your location and age range by even a few miles or years. Doing so is a signal to eHarmony that you’re a very active member, meaning you’re likely to get more match recommendations.
eHarmony Tips for Emailing (#7-10)
eHarmony’s messaging system is just as unique as every other aspect of the site, and it makes starting a conversation, keeping it going, and taking it to the next level really easy. Take advantage of these tips, and it’ll be smooth sailing.
7. Take Advantage of Guided Communication
eHarmony’s Open Communication feature allows you to chat as you would on most other dating websites (if that’s what you’re most comfortable with), and you can get right to it by clicking Fast Track. However, if you’re nervous about that first contact and aren’t sure what to say, the site offers Guided Communication. With this feature, you can send a few getting-to-know-you questions that eHarmony provides as well as 10 must-haves and can’t-stands.
For more information, we have an article that explains everything you could ever want or need to know about Guided Communication and other ways you can chat with your fellow members.
8. Don’t Copy and Paste
Yes, eHarmony has millions of members. Yes, it can be overwhelming. No, that doesn’t mean you should send the same message to a bunch of different people — you’re better than that. Whenever you think about doing this, remember how annoying it is to receive canned emails from people and companies. You can almost smell how disingenuous they are.
You can still have a formula for your messages, though. In fact, we even recommend it, especially for the first message. What you’ll want to do is mention something specific from their profile that you like, make the connection between that thing and you, and end with a call to action.
9. Ask as Many Questions as You Answer
People love talking about themselves — it’s science. That’s how you can kick things off with a match. They’ll probably ask you questions in return, so try to keep a good balance (not talking about yourself too much but also not treating them like an interviewee). You’ll also enjoy the convo more if you ask questions that you honestly want to hear the answers to.
10. Be Considerate of the Time
I’ll admit that there are plenty of nights when I go to sleep at 10, and I know I’m not the only one. Don’t lose track of the time when you start communicating with someone. They might have to be at work at some crazy hour like 6 a.m. Or there might be a time difference. Or they might just like to sleep through the night without getting a notification from eHarmony (aka you).
I’m not saying you can’t have some fun late-night messaging — that’s one of the best parts of the early dating stages. But ask them how they feel about it and if they have a cutoff they prefer.
eHarmony Tips for Dating (#11-14)
We’re not going to leave you hanging once you meet a special someone. We’ve got some steps you can take to ensure your time offline is just as enjoyable as your time online.
11. Do Something Casual
Coffee, drinks, ice cream, walks — doing something short and casual is a great way to remove some of the pressure that comes with first dates. Not to mention, if you’re not feeling it (or they’re not), it’ll be over soon and you’ll be on your way. You won’t have to sit through happy hour, dinner, and dessert knowing this person isn’t right for you. If you think they are right for you, a short first date is a good teaser for the second. The anticipation will be palpable!
12. Plan to Meet at the Venue
Meeting at the bar, restaurant, park, or wherever is the smart way to go. Remember, you don’t actually know this person, even if you’ve been chatting for weeks and it feels like you do. I’m not saying your date is Michael Myers or something, but what if he is? Seriously, though, people have been taken advantage of or hurt because they trusted someone they had just met, if you count online as meeting.
Not only do we recommend not having the person pick you up (or you picking them up), we also recommend telling a friend or family member where you’ll be, what time you’ll be there, and who you’ll be with. That way, if something happens, they can help or at least are aware that you should be checking in with them.
13. Don’t Put on a Facade
It sounds corny to suggest you be yourself, but it’s honestly the truth. Some people get so worried about impressing their dates that they become a totally different person. This is just another human being, so treat them as you would a friend — cracking jokes, asking for their opinion, listening to their stories, providing your feedback, etc. Exaggerating who you are can be tiring work as well. You’ll feel as if you always have to be on in front of them, and no relationship should be like that.
14. If You Had Fun, Ask for a Second Date
I really do believe most singles are at the point where they don’t want to play games anymore. Waiting three days after a date to call someone or responding at least an hour later to a text so you don’t come off as desperate is manipulative and a waste of time.
People appreciate authenticity and honesty, so if you enjoyed their company and want to see them again, simply tell them. There’s nothing wrong with talking about the second date on the first date if you both feel the chemistry.
eHarmony: A Foolproof Dating Site You Won’t Have Any Trouble On!
Over the past two decades, eHarmony has gone through enough trial and error to learn what singles want, so you’re already off to a great start just by signing up. If you’re a perfectionist, though, and strive to get an A+ in everything you do, these tips will help you achieve that on eHarmony!