The Most Important Part of Contacting Women Online

Online Dating

The Most Important Part of Contacting Women Online

Joshua Pompey Joshua Pompey • 9/25/14

For most of us, filling out the subject line of an online dating email feels like nothing more than a mandated waste of time imposed upon us by the dating sites.

Instead of taking the time to fill out a clever subject line, most men will opt toward leaving this portion of the email blank or simply writing some variation of the word hello.

I used to be one of these guys.

But after long periods of growing more and more successful with this medium of meeting women online, I realized that just like everything else in our online dating lives (the photos, the written profile, etc.), subject lines can and will play a key role toward helping us find success.

When written properly, a great subject line at the top of our emails will accomplish two important tasks:

  1. It will ignite curiosity, thus increasing the odds of the email being opened.
  2. It will serve as a clever introduction to the bodies of our emails, thus leaving us with a well-rounded and fully developed message.


“When written properly, a great

subject line will ignite curiosity.”

Suppose I use this subject line:

“OK, I have a confession to make…”

This subject line is going to raise a woman’s attention if it is surrounded by 10 other subjects that are either blank or filled with some variation of the word hello.

Women will open the email of the intriguing subject line first. To top it off, she will have that heightened emotional state before even reading the email.

If we follow up this subject line with something in the body that makes a woman laugh or taps into some of the attraction building qualities I often write about, we will have a nice one-two punch in our email.

As long as our photo galleries and written dating profiles are properly constructed, the odds of receiving a response will go up immeasurably.

What would be a good follow-up to this?

Let’s pretend I live by the Jersey Shore, an area full of stereotypes that are perpetuated by the media.

If my subject line is, “OK, I have a confession to make,” I could follow up with:

“So here’s the thing: I know I live in Jersey, but I don’t have orange skin, don’t own any sparkly shirts and have never actually fist pumped other than to mock someone. Is that just way too crazy for a Jersey girl like yourself, or are we going to make this work?”

I will then follow this up with a question that relates to her profile in order to make it clear I am not spamming this line to a hundred other women.

And there you have it. A lesson on how to write subject lines that will enhance your emails dramatically!

Guys, what’s your typical approach when contacting women online? Do you use a catchy subject line, or do you tend to go with a standard “hello”?

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