He’s played everything from the Joker in “Batman” to the possessed writer in “The Shining” to a harsh colonel in “A Few Good Men.”

But one of my favorite roles was his younger-woman-loving character in “Something’s Gotta Give” with Diane Keaton. He loved their allure, attitude and looks, but eventually he became attracted to someone his own age and in the same socioeconomic level.

The entire movie was a learning experience and represented his life coming full circle with help from women inside his age bracket – a terrific story.

Guys, many of you can relate.

It’s a well-known fact men are much more visual than women when it comes to attraction. We analyze the exterior first before walking across the dance floor and exploring deeper.

And let’s face it, we like what we like and it’s just the way God created us.

But how does this change as we grow older? Do our tastes in women mature while our hairlines recede? Do we begin losing our desire for those cheerleaders and girls plastered on calendars for the more settled faces in the crowd?

I think you know the answers.

We’ve all seen the older bald or gray-haired guy with the sensible shoes and expanding waistline walking hand in hand with the carefree 20-something.

We watch, laugh and quickly draw the same conclusions: Donald Trump-sized wallet, paid escort, daddy figure.

We can’t help but flash back to those images of Anna Nicole Smith bouncing on her frail, elderly hubby’s lap while loosely recording some of his last requests, supposedly giving her access to his billions.

For most of us, the reasons for her affections were obvious. Realistically, ol’ J. Howard Marshall probably laughed all the way to his grave. He was a smart man and I’m sure he understood the games being played.

“Having a successful relationship is all

about a mutual appreciation of each other.”

Can some of those relationships exist for the right reasons?

How young is just too young to be considered healthy?

And if you can’t help wanting to date or marry a woman a few years or even decades younger, how could you be certain she’s hanging around for love instead of those keys from Mercedes Benz?

We all love who we love and are not always attracted to those society says is “right,” “wrong,” “appropriate” or “a good fit.”

Love doesn’t discriminate when Cupid points his arrow and makes our hearts skip a beat while skyrocketing our libidos into astronomical levels. It’s all a matter of chemistry.

Back to the question: How young is too young?

This could be debated while injecting all sorts of views. In the world of public opinion, most would argue an age difference of more than 15 years is a stretch – some might say 20.

But look at it this way, if a woman shares your same values, likes, dislikes and tastes, who’s to say age really matters?

However, if the age difference is so great the memory of rotary phones, Michael Jackson and gas under $2 a gallon is completely foreign to her, then you best pause and take a step back.

Having a successful relationship is all about a mutual appreciation of each other.

But let’s be real here: A girl graduating high school and hooking up with a guy already looking forward to retirement is a fantasy. It isn’t going to work if you have grand kids and she desires her firstborn.

After all, what would you do on a Saturday night? She wants to go dancing at 11 p.m. and you’re slipping on your PJs. She’s coming into her sexuality and yours (let’s admit it) is on the downward slope.

How about music? You love the golden oldies while she prefers Beyonce and Taylor Swift.

If you’re bothered by these items while watching her in her newest bikini as you contemplate even taking your shirt off at the beach, well, fantasies are great but it’s time for a more realistic approach to finding a mate.

Are you in a relationship where the age difference is a primary concern? Do you know someone who is? We’d love to hear from you.

Photo source: thefancarpet.com.

What arouses a woman today seeing that I’m in my early 50s and she isn’t?

I want her to be attracted to me, but I do not want to push the issue of her seeing me as an older man.

-Stan (Ohio)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Stan,

Women are attracted to the same things men are: good health, loyalty, intelligence and honesty. Men might also add in beauty and women might add financial worth.

But you used the word aroused. Are you talking about sex only? If that is the case and she is much younger than you, you are talking about an arrangement, not a relationship.

But know this: Women are attracted to a man’s mind as much or more than his body.

On the other hand, if you sincerely want a romantic relationship with someone who is not your biological peer, then you’ve got to ask yourself about her reasons for being in the relationship.

Healthy relationships are an exchange of care and you might eventually need a kind of care she isn’t interested in providing.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Researchers found 74 percent of women ages 15 to 44 have lived with a man before marriage by the time they’re 30, compared to 26 percent of women by the time they’re 20.

The study consisted of interviews from 12,279 women between 2006 and 2010 and also included data from previous reports in 1995 and 2002.

Researchers found 48 percent of women from 2006 to 2010 moved in with a man prior to marriage, up from 43 percent in 2002 and 34 percent in 1995.

Forty percent of those relationships became marriages after three years and about 32 percent continued as cohabitations.

“Seventy-four percent of women ages 15 to 44 have

lived with a man by the time they’re 30.”

What’s more, these relationships are lasting longer than they used to. The average cohabitation relationship now lasts 22 months versus 13 months back in 1995.

The study found 20 percent of women cohabitating outside of marriage get pregnant within the first year.

About 25 percent of births from women ages 15 to 44 occurred while they were cohabitating, up from 14 percent in 2002.

“One take on these data would be that cohabitating families are choosing to stay together, they are becoming more committed and they are seeing their families, many with children, as a legitimate family form and are feeling less pressure to marry. It’s the new normal,” said Pamela J. Smock, research professor at the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor.

Source: CDC.gov. Photo source: madamennoire.com.

I am 67 years old. I lost my wife last year and I am interested in finding another.

However, there is a 38-year-old woman who wants to marry me. I think she is too young for me. She says age is just a number, but I don’t believe that.

What do you think?

-James (Alabama)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear James,

You would consider marrying a woman just because she wants to marry you? Wow. You’re easy.

I say ask yourself what you want in a partner. Do you love her? Are you compatible?

If she is too young for you, move on and date your peers. Single women are available across the lifespan. In fact, single women over 50 far outnumber men, so it’s a great playing field.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

I am a very “young” 69-year-old woman. I do not look, feel or act my age. I have been on a dating site, but the men all look so old! I was in a relationship with someone who was 56 and I was 68. We had a great time, but he was still hung up on his ex-wife.

How do I go about meeting someone?

-Janet (Ohio)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Janet,

You have two choices:

1. Send online invitations to men who look younger.

2. Analyze why you reject men who look their age. Might they remind you of yours?

I always ask people who have a youthful look and energy level: Are you pursuing health or denying age? There’s a subtle difference.

We all get old and wise and we all must learn to accept our bodies can’t do exactly what they did in prior decades.

But there are amazing gifts that come with someone who has grown up and is thriving in their role as elder guardian of the culture.

And since all relationships are about a mutual exchange of care, in this stage of life, it’s more important than ever to choose someone who can give care.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Still, while you’re a single midlife woman looking and feeling great in your 50s, it’s ego deflating and daunting to face the online singles scene when all you see are 50-something single men wanting to only date much younger women.

Senior single women will often come to my singles seminars saying it seems like all the senior single men only want to date women in their 30s and 40s.

You can feel demoralized if that’s all you’re reading on the senior singles sites in your area.

Take heart and know the mature men who are thinking they only want to date much younger women are usually the freshly divorced men, newly single again after just coming out of their former marriage.

Give them a little time, and they’ll come around. Much of what he currently thinks he wants is based on what he no longer wants from his ex-wife.

Rest assured, once he has gone on more than five dates with much younger women, he’ll most likely come around to desiring attractive mature women who are also in his age range.

“He thinks he wants the 28-year-old

until he is out on the dance floor with her.”

What do senior single men want in women now? 

What they really want is someone who is attractive, takes care of her looks and enjoys an active lifestyle.

He wants to share some of life’s activities with an alluring woman who can be a life companion and mate.

But the pace of a 28-year-old woman versus a 48-year-old woman really is different.

In a light fantasy, he thinks he wants the 28- or 38-year-old until he is out on the dance floor of life with her a few times.

Then reality kicks in and he adjusts his sights for an attractive woman who is his peer.

That’s when he’ll start noticing you!

Keep searching and getting out there, and you can find quality senior singles.

What are you seeing in the dating profiles of senior men where you are? Is it encouraging or discouraging for you?

Photo source: columbiaobgyn.org.

Many relationships worked very well (a CEO dating a waiter, for example) and status wasn’t really an issue.

In the straight world, when an older man dates a younger woman, these relationships can work successfully for both concerned.

The older man might feel he has an improved “stud-like” status and the woman may feel she has established herself at a higher level.

OK, she might be classed as a gold digger, but it’s an accepted and well-trodden path.

Does the same apply in the gay world?

The answer is yes.

In my dating life, prior to marrying my husband, I was always attracted to and dated older men.

There was something about an older masculine man established in life, knowing his own mind and with a life plan worked out. I liked the idea of this structure.

There are many other reasons younger guys are attracted to older men. Through the ‘80s and ‘90s, if you were older, you were thought to have escaped the AIDS epidemic — this was a trophy in itself.

Today, there is a whole genre of “Daddy Chasers” that shows there is an aesthetic appeal toward older guys (and the fantasies that revolve around them).

“You have to appreciate you may experience

some resistance from friends and family.”

Why didn’t I marry someone older than me?

Well I had the opportunity to do so, but it just didn’t sit right for me and my personal choices at the time.

When you are in your 20s, a guy in his 40s doesn’t seem that old. However, when you’re in your 30s dating someone in their 50s, situations do arise (and certain things don’t rise to the occasion).

Perhaps I’d grown up to be the man I wanted to be through the experiences of dating older men and found a man and partner with whom we could grow old together.

The things to consider looking at when dating an older man are:

1. Older men have experience and you can learn from them.

However, sometimes the adage, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” can also apply. As we get older, we get into a comfortable routine and it’s not as easy to change.

2. Age doesn’t matter when you’re fit and healthy.

But when one of you is near to retirement, the body does slow down and this can mean the life in the fast lane quickly turns into slow Sunday drives along a country road.

3. Finances.

In the last couple of decades, people have had more flexibility around their career options and increased choice has become the norm.

Some people have jumped from one job/career to another, and although they have the experience that age brings, they don’t necessarily have the financial stability and rewards.

4. Resistance from family and friends.

You have to appreciate that you may experience some resistance from friends and family. Think about introducing your parents to a partner that is the same age as (or older than) your father.

Likewise, integrating into an older crowd can be hugely valuable, but if you’d prefer to go out drinking and dancing, you may find that a bridge night doesn’t do it for you.

5. A partner passes away.

If you’re looking at a long-term relationship, prepare yourself for your partner passing away before you.

When you are older, will you want to be single or getting back into the dating pool again?

The above points may seem negative and you may feel I’m advising against dating an older gentleman, but many relationships do work.

You have to enter them with your eyes wide open. I value the time I’ve spent with older guys, and I hope they do, too.

Be honest and open, and if it’s a temporary relationship for you and a permanent relationship to the other guy, you need to be fair to him and end the relationship.

The older you get, the more challenging it becomes to create a good relationship.

What are your experiences with dating older men?

She’s older and sexy in a very different way than lesbians your own age. She’s confident. She’s sure of herself in ways that some of the lesbians you’ve dated who are your own age aren’t.

She’s had a lot of experiences and a few big adventures. She’s so damn interesting and sexy. You can’t stop thinking about her, but she’s so much older than you.

What do you do?

If you’re the go-after-what-you-want kind of gay girl, you proceed directly to her location and dive in with conversation.

You can even just go right for it and ask her if she’s single and available for a drink or coffee and a one-on-one conversation.

If you’re like most of us, you’re a little on the shy side and sort of introverted. It’s not your style to just walk up and start asking questions or asking for a date.

The first thing we all do is ask around to learn more about her. Who knows her? Is she available? Where is she from, and what does she do?

All that information can feel good because it creates some sense of safety.

You feel good because you now know something about her, but you haven’t even said hello to her yet. And whatever you know isn’t getting you to a date.

“Don’t start off by getting stuck on

how old she is or how young you are.”

How to ask her.

If you want a date with her, you’re going to have to figure out how to ask her.

When I had the experience of much younger women asking me out (yes, it has happened a few times), I loved the attention.

I loved that a lesbian half my age thought I was both that interesting and that attractive.

Each one approached me in different ways.

One was very direct. We met at a meetup event and she came over and started talking to me. In the course of an hour, she just asked me out. Simple, right?

Another darling younger woman who I’d known and seen around for years asked me out by text after we’d seen each other casually at a local park during a gay rights rally.

Was I surprised? I was shocked actually and totally flattered. We did go out a few times. It was sweet but not destined to be a relationship.

Once I had a party at my house and invited every single lesbian I knew in the city.

A whole lot of them turned up and we were having a great time. The doorbell rang later in the evening and I went to open it and met a beautiful younger woman I’d never seen before.

She actually lived just down the street from me. We talked a bit and I went on to my hostess duties.

During the evening, every time I turned around she was there. She was also the last to leave and she took that moment to ask me to join her for coffee the next morning.

I said yes. We enjoyed a few months of dating and then both moved on.

From my perspective, I don’t ask much younger women out, but I definitely have been open to being asked out by younger women. (Please don’t call me your cougar.)

You have nothing to fear.

I’m sharing my personal experience to help you see that you really have nothing to fear.

The worst that is going to happen is she says no, but there is a chance she will say yes. If you never ask, the answer will always be no.

In my own case, I said yes a couple of times and I said no a couple of times. In all cases, I was flattered by being asked. We all want to be wanted.

How much older is too much older?

In the straight world, older men date much younger women all the time.

Older women are now much more openly dating younger men in the straight world, so why would lesbians be any different?

There are lots of reasons why this is happening, and it happens in our dear little lesbian world also.

Don’t start off by getting stuck on how old she is or how young you are. If you ask and she says yes, you’ll figure it all out as you go along.

That’s what dating is all about — figuring out if you are a good match for each other while having fun and enjoying being a lesbian.

Go for it. Ask her out. She might prefer you don’t call her your cougar, but I’ll let her tell you that herself.

Photo source: sitesplus.co.uk

I am 18 years old and I am in a “relationship” with a 36-year-old man. I say “relationship” because he and I do have a large age gap, and we are afraid of my family’s reaction. He has his own place and his own career, and he knows I am just starting out and is supportive of me in every way. We just fear what my family might think, considering he also just emigrated from Turkey six years ago.

Is this wrong for us to do? Would it be bad if we became intimate, and how do we navigate through this big hot mess we’ve got going on?

-Caitlin (California)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear sweet Caitlin,

Here’s what I know for sure. No matter what I say, you are going to give yourself the lesson you need.

This is an amazing opportunity. You can feel like a big girl by trying big-boy pants. You can piss off your parents — something every teenager loves to do. And you can get tangled in a hot mess of lies, risky sex and family vengeance. Good times.

But this is also an amazing opportunity to give yourself the love you deserve. Self-love. This is a chance to go deep and find out what missing piece of you makes infatuation with a man twice your age so healing.

The answer is a 10-session therapy trip — but let me lay out the possibilities here.

This man represents: protection you don’t feel, financial security you don’t have, a rescue from having to learn peer-to-peer emotional and sexual communication, a rescue from your family who doesn’t seem to understand you.

There are probably more voids this guy fills for you. So I ask how can you get whole, fulfill your needs and grow into a mature person at the right pace?

Can you love yourself until your beautiful mind oozes out every pore and opens your eyes to the fact you have far more choices than this man?

Hey, maybe that mature, self-confident, kick-ass beautiful woman who emerges will look at this middle-aged dude and think he’s a bit creepy for lusting after a teenager. Who knows?

This is an amazing opportunity for you. You are going to teach yourself something here. This could be an opportunity for a really painful lesson (pray it doesn’t become a permanent lesson because of a pregnancy or STD), or it could be an amazing opportunity to say NO.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

A new report, featured in Match.com’s LoveGeist report, suggests a woman’s priorities for a mate simply change as she ages. According to the report, what constitutes the “perfect man” for a woman is going to be a lot different when she’s 22 than when she’s 32, 42, 52 or 62.

However, the report makes it clear women continue to maintain high standards throughout their lives, even as their values shift, ultimately finding that senior women are actually considerably pickier about who they date than young women.

“Women ages 18 to 24 are most interested in

a man who shares their cultural taste.”

Women ages 18 to 24 are most interested in a man who shares their cultural tastes, who their friends will like, and who is in great physical shape.

Once women enter the 25 to 34 age bracket, ambition becomes a lot more important, as does sexual compatibility. Interestingly enough, sexual compatibility is most important for women in this age bracket, even though women ages 18 to 24 value physical fitness and aesthetic attractiveness more.

Women ages 35 to 44 are the most likely to date a much older man, while women ages 45 to 54 are the most likely to date a much younger man.

Finally, women 55 and older are more interested in intelligence and a shared sense of humor more than anything else.

Source: Money Control. Photo source: bp.blogspot.com