I Can’t Find Someone With Similar Interests. What Am I Doing Wrong?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

I’m a college student in my senior year. Bars and parties were never my scene. I seem to be in this weird spot where none of my good friends hang around the kind of places/do the kind of activities I’m interested in. I’m pretty involved in my major and know most everyone in that community, but I never felt the desire to be more than friends with anyone in that community. I usually feel like I could use a wingman or if I have one, they seem out of their element. I’m not particularly ugly or repellent or anything.

So what am I doing wrong? What could I do to meet more of the kinds of people I’m interested in?


Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Matthew, this is so interesting. You have little in common with your close friends and a lot in common with your distant friends. Yet, you say you don’t want to be closer to people who share your interests.

Hmmmm…. As I see it, you’ve got three choices to avoid isolation.

A.) Loosen up and accept your close friends for who they are.

B.) Start to socialize with the people from your major

C.) Find a new group.

If bars and parties aren’t your scene, find a quieter scene where like-minded people congregate. University campuses have plenty of diversity. Use this senior year to spread your wings and find a new social world.

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