I’m Going Through a Divorce, So I Can’t “Date.” Are There Resources for Me?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

I’m presently going through a divorce and am in desperate need of someone to talk to. I’m separated but not divorced yet, so I really can’t “date.”

Are there resources out there for someone in my position?

-John (Pennsylvania)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear John,

Divorce is one of the biggest life stressors and I understand your need to process your feelings with another person.

I also applaud the idea that you understand dating right now would be inappropriate. It would also be fruitless because, in your mental state, you might not be good company.

Single people report dates who talk about their ex too much are a turn-off.

But you need to talk to someone, so I highly suggest you find a therapist who can give you space and guidance to express your feelings.

If cost is a problem, check with your health insurance company to see if they cover any mental health issues.

The only “diagnosis” you might receive is that of an “adjustment disorder,” meaning you are adjusting to a big life change. Also, you might check with your local university psychology department, where affordable counseling clinics are available.


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