I’ve Been Trying to Find A Date for Years. What’s the Problem?

Ive Been Trying To Date For Years Whats The Problem
Updated:
Dr. Wendy Walsh
Lillian Castro

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Editor: Lillian Castro

Our dating experts guide readers step-by-step through relationship challenges and romantic decisions in our popular series of advice articles.

Reader Question:

I’ve been trying to find a date for years. What’s the problem?

-Thomas (Pennsylvania)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Well Thomas, “finding” a date is only half the battle. Then you have to convince her to go out with you. Basically, there are two important elements to finding love: Knowing which pond your market swims in and knowing which bait to use.

Are you out in the world joining charity groups, attending cultural events or being athletic? Those are great fishing ponds. I also love to remind men that walk-a-thons that benefit breast cancer have a wide women-to-men ratio.

And then there’s your game. Are you moving too fast before she trusts you enough to give up her number? I would suggest developing a common interest friendship before moving into something romantic.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

About the Author

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Dr. Wendy Walsh

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Women's Dating Expert

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

See Dr. Wendy's full bio »

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