She Says She Loves Me But Needs More Time. What Should I Do?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles and reports have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

Reader Question:

A woman I have been seeing told me she loves me, but she said she needs time to get her feet back on the ground.

She recently broke off an engagement because of something other than me, but I’m not sure if that’s true.

What should I do?

-J. (Pennsylvania)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear J.,

So you think she’s lying and she’s too afraid to tell you she’s not interested in you? Well, telling you she loves you is a strange compromise.

I would listen to her. She’s not ready for a big relationship right now. She’s probably telling you the truth.

But if you act sweet, compliant and hang around like a wounded puppy, I promise she won’t be interested in you when she does get her feet back on the ground.

Tell her you totally understand, and then give her space. Let her come to you when she’s ready.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Advertiser Disclosure is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.