The Power Of Being A Secret Santa

Men's Dating

The Power of Being a Secret Santa

David Wygant

Written by: David Wygant

David Wygant

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship coach, author and speaker. To find out more about David and all of his dating and relationship-building products, visit

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Do you have a crush on a woman right now? Is there a woman out there you really want to get to know better? Are you too afraid to talk to her?

She might be the clerk at the grocery store.

She might be the barista who serves you drinks in the morning at Starbucks.

She might be somebody that works on the same floor as you.

Nevertheless, ‘tis the season to be giving, and it’s time to get creative.

So how do you meet the woman you see regularly but have no idea how to approach?

Give her a gift.

I know right now you’re probably thinking to yourself, “David has lost his mind. He’s telling me to go out there and buy a gift for a woman I don’t even know.”

Now I’m not talking about a big gift, just something like a gift certificate, a cup of coffee, a flower, a candy cane, a Frosty the Snowman doll — whatever.


“What is Santa Clause but a

symbol for giving unconditionally?”

Here’s what I want you to do:

You have less than two weeks left until Christmas.

I want you to get something that’s holiday themed, and I want you to carry it around at all times. So when you see the woman you’re most attracted to, give her the gift, look at her and say:

“Merry Christmas.” (Or for the politically correct people, “Happy holidays.”) “I just wanted to thank you for taking care of me this year and for being so friendly all the time when I came up to your register. My gift to you is something every adult child should have…a candy cane.”

Let’s say it’s a woman you pass by in the hallway at work. The next time you see her, look at her and say, “I just want to wish you a happy holidays. I see you around all the time and I’ve never talked to you, but I just wanted to wish you the best during this holiday season.”

Then hand her a candy cane, look at her and say, “Remember when we were children, how wonderful it was to decorate the tree and have somebody hand you a candy cane?”

Remind her of how awesome it is to receive a gift like the one you’ve just given her.

It’s all about stepping out of your comfort zone. It’s about being cute. It’s about being romantic. It’s about being different.

So get into the holiday spirit a bit this year and be a Secret Santa. Granted, she’s going to know you gave it to her, but still, what is Santa Clause but a symbol for giving unconditionally?

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