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The Short Version: After Nine Tonight was created out of one couple’s desire to ignite the passion and intimacy in their own marriage. Suzy and Doug Olds wanted to provide couples with romantic, arousing video content and a plethora of resources to help release day-to-day stress and unlock desire. The site’s film series inspires women with scenarios that will, no doubt, get their tired or overworked minds in the mood. After Nine Tonight helps couples overcome the all-too-common dips in libido that married couples experience.
A few years after Suzy and Doug Olds’ last child was born, they noticed that their sex life had fizzled. Suzy found that her sexual thoughts had evaporated because she was trying to balance the demands of kids, household, family, and her career.
“I dreaded that 10 p.m. shoulder tap; I wanted to sleep way more than I wanted sex. But what I didn’t realize at the time was that, while I didn’t need it, my relationship did,” Dr. Suzy Olds said. “Physical intimacy was a form of communication for us as a couple, and, without it, we seemed less close, less in love.”
They knew they loved each other and wanted to fight for the intimacy in their marriage, but Suzy just couldn’t get in the mood. Suzy and Doug refused to wait things out and hope for improvement. Suzy even discussed the issue with her doctor and found that decreased sexual desire is common in women. The hardest thing for Suzy to accept was that there was no solution — no pill, no exercises, no treatment plan — just one idea from her doctor.
“We were disappointed that the health community didn’t seem to have any real solutions to such a common issue. So we set out to try to understand it and solve it on our own,” Suzy said. “We read books, watched videos, reviewed scholarly articles, interviewed doctors, and consulted experts.”
Suzy and Doug took their very personal struggle with intimacy and created After Nine Tonight, a company focused on helping committed couples all over the world experience happier marriages, more satisfaction, and stronger families.
“When I complained to my gynecologist at the time, she suggested that I needed some super soft porn, but there was none out there,” Suzy said. “And I realized that the content that I did find could be effective, but it was way more explicit than what I wanted. Nothing is just nice and suggestive — more like a story for women. I wanted to connect with the characters. After looking for quite a while and not finding the content I wanted, we decided to create it. That launched our business.”
Part of what makes After Nine Tonight so relatable is that it addresses both the female and male perspectives on intimacy challenges. Doug understands firsthand how frustrating it is when men want to connect with their partners, but life’s distractions get in the way. He helps men find things they can do to bridge the intimacy divide and help their wives feel supported and understood — mentally, physically, and emotionally.
“Scientists have proven that a woman’s brain is prewired for multitasking, and, yes, that means they’re better at it than we are,” Doug said in a video on After Nine Tonight. “And it also means that, when she hits the pillow at night, her mind is probably consumed with to-do lists, shopping lists, carpool schedules — things that are all very important, but they’re a hundred miles away from intimacy.”
After Nine Tonight provides plenty of tips for building the mood and encourages them to stay the course.
“It’s important to remember that being in the mood is the result of the combination of the immediate situation as well as the status of the relationship as a whole. Immediate mood builders are things like erotic books, intimate talking, romantic music, mood lighting, and the After Nine Tonight film series,” Doug said.
But the key to maintaining intimacy lies in having a solid relationship, which means you need to love and appreciate your wife, as well as stay in tune with her needs.
Suzy suggests that men pay attention to the areas that are causing the most distraction and take action to address those concerns.
“If thoughts of housework are overwhelming her, step up and do the laundry and unload the dishwasher without being asked,” Suzy said. “If she’s concerned about your child’s recent performance at school, be there to listen even if you think the issue is trivial. Nothing improves a husband’s sex appeal more than a confident man who loves and appreciates his wife and tries to fulfill her needs — especially the non-sexual needs.”
After Nine Tonight helps couples rekindle the passion that so often dims in long-term relationships — especially when trying to balance the demands of children, households, families, and careers.
“We are committed to helping busy parents, busy moms, in particular, understand why our desire for intimacy decreases, and, more importantly, provide tips and tools to get it back,” Suzy said. “Our journey is focused on creating video content that appeals to busy mothers, enabling them to cut through the everyday stresses that occupy the mind and awaken the natural desires for intimacy.”
Suzy and Doug have taken the time to create video content that is approved by both couples and medical professionals. The short films are intended to be between a PG-13 and R-rating. According to Vancouver-based Relationship and Sex Therapist Dr. Bianca Rucker, the After Nine Tonight film series incorporates positive, erotic storylines that make room for couples to be imaginative.
“The context of the scenario is positive — an important element for many of the couples I see in my sex therapy practice. A bit of a plot draws you in and then you can either let things simmer in your mind, or carry on with some erotic fun,” Dr. Bianca wrote.
Episode 1 is titled “Staycation” and can be purchased through the After Nine Tonight website. In it, Simone shares details about an erotic surprise date night that her husband, Will, planned. After she describes the encounter, the other women are inspired to share their own stories. You can rent the film for $4.99 or purchase it for $6.99. Couples won’t want to miss new episodes, so the site will have monthly and yearly subscriptions available.
Suzy mentioned that After Nine Tonight episodes are only 15 minutes long and intended to declutter a busy mom’s mind and create mental arousal so that she’ll desire intimate interaction more than sleep. The short runtime is also ideal for the limited time — and energy — most parents have each night after the kids go to bed.
“The characters are all married couples with situations that are plausible, and the focus is on the build-up to an encounter, not just the encounter,” Suzy said.
In addition to the film series, the Suzy Talk blog was created as a way of informing, inspiring and supporting others as they deal with low desire in their relationships. Suzy’s passion for this work is close to her heart.
Articles include relationship-saving tips that couples can use whether it’s “Ten Little Things” you can do to reignite the spark, “How to Spice Up Your Sex Life As a Busy Mom,” or “How to Initiate Sex More Often”, among many others.
Katy, a mom of three in Chicago, has found Suzy’s tips and After Nine Tonight to be helpful because it helped her connect with her husband and create an even more solid marriage.
“After Nine Tonight is a brilliant creation by a Ph.D. mom who understands the needs of women with children,” Katy wrote in a testimonial. “Suzy has clearly researched and thoughtfully analyzed what helps busy moms to feel attractive, confident, and loving with their husbands. After Nine Tonight is about healthy and caring relationships, and it inspired me to make my marriage stronger and more exciting by re-igniting a fun spark in our marriage.”
Suzy told us it all starts with the woman’s mind.
“The female brain is the most important sex organ. When we are mentally prepared for sex, it can be so much more enjoyable. I experienced this for a long time, and I feel like my relationship was suffering,” she said. “So I’m glad that I was able to get past it. I have learned what gets me aroused, and it means a lot for us to be able to help other people.”
Couples dealing with low desire are often nervous, embarrassed, and ashamed to admit their struggles. That’s why After Nine Tonight offers a supportive and fun community for them to join.
“This is a vulnerable area for most people — they don’t talk about it. It’s admitting a problem in your relationship, so it’s not always easy to share, because saying something about your sex life is also saying something about your partner, too,” Suzy said. “That’s why it’s not always easy for people to share.”
Suzy and Doug want couples to know that intimacy is an essential ingredient in a healthy marriage and that a decrease in desire doesn’t have to be an accepted side effect when life gets busy.
“We have created two tools for busy parents coping with low desire. A website that serves to inform, encourage, and support parents who are impacted by low desire and our film series that serves to entertain, engage, and arouse unlike anything on the market,” Doug said.
After Nine Tonight has already achieved many of the goals that Suzy and Doug had when they set out to create the series. Intimacy has certainly returned for them and many other couples that have joined the After Nine Tonight community.
Due to the obligations of their day jobs, neither Suzy nor Doug are able to spend the time required to continue to build community and expand the film series. They are currently looking for strategic partners to assist with growing their business and producing additional After Nine Tonight episodes.