When Do You Know You’re a Couple?

Is the guy I’m dating my new boyfriend? How do I know?

As a personal matchmaker, having orchestrated thousands of introductions, I get this question often, from both the guy and the girl.

The first few dates have gone really well. You’re having fun together. You’re settling into a groove, but you don’t really know how to define this new “thing” you’ve got going on.

1. He introduces you to his friends, co-workers and family. He’s proud to have you in his life, and he wants to share his world with you.
2. You have a title now. When he speaks about you, he refers to you as his girlfriend.
3. He’s not dating anyone else, and you’ve both agreed to be exclusive with each other.
4. His profile is no longer on any online dating site.
5. Saturday nights are yours. He invests his precious free time with you because your relationship is his priority.
6. He is affectionate with you in public. He puts his arm around you, holds your hand…
7. He welcomes you into his home.
8. He initiates conversations about your future together. You talk openly and freely about your relationship and what you both want for the present and for the future, and you’re in alignment as to the type of relationship you are both wanting to have.

My strongest recommendation for women who are seeking a long-term relationship is to hold off on sex until you KNOW you’ve got yourself a boyfriend.

My simplest rule for women in dating is to keep your pants on until you know he’s not seeing anyone else and you’ve had that conversation about exclusivity, birth control and STDs.

If you’re not comfortable having that conversation, then just keep your pants on a little longer. If he’s not willing to wait, then he’s probably not boyfriend material anyway.

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