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IronWardog91ParticipantJune 17, 2015 at 1:18 am #81158
I dated a girl for a few years before we had a falling out. I still don’t understand what happened there, but we didn’t speak to each other for months afterward. We recently started talking again and we both consider each other invaluable, close friends again. The problem is that after getting over losing her the first time, I’ve fallen for her a second time, and she is still with the guy she ran off with – although I have doubts about their happiness based on our conversations. I forgave her for what happened before and she knows that, and she knows I always cared about her even after we parted, but her only hint toward how she feels was a claim that she regretted pushing me away and losing a friend. I don’t want to try and manipulate her – I respect her too much for that. I want to give us another chance, but most of all I want her to be happy, and I’m not convinced that she is. Her self esteem has tanked, and she blames herself for too much. What do I say/do?
rabijaggaParticipantJune 18, 2015 at 5:30 am #81288
Have a serious talk with her spelling out what is bothering you.You should by now knows her dos and don’ts.Do more of what she likes and you would be surprise to see positive changes in her towards you.
TxCincyParticipantJune 18, 2015 at 4:25 pm #81303
I was in a very similar situation judging by the little information you provided, and my advice is part ways and let life run its course. The girl I dated made some mistakes in her life that I wish I would’ve been there to prevent, but life has its way of making things work out. Don’t force anything because of emotion. You’ve already experienced emotions shifting with the sands, don’t try to build something on it especially if you can’t describe why the feelings changed because they simply will again. My ex left an engagement to come back to me and things just returned to where we were when it ended the first time.
Sorry you’re going through this, but those friendships are important, keep it that way.
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