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erika995ParticipantSeptember 1, 2016 at 6:21 pm #110374
I’ve been in a confusing situation with a guy I’ve been talking to for a few months now. When we first started talking he would text me all the time and was always the one to initiate. I did find it strange that after almost 3 weeks of constant texting he hadn’t actually asked me out yet. I had heard that he previously was like this with other girls and has been single for a while. We eventually went on a date and had a great time, there was chemistry between us and he seemed really into me. He works offshore so the next day after our date he had to go to work for several weeks but we continued talking both texting and he phoned me too. However, when he got back we continued texting but he never actually mentioned going out again. I met him out one night and (drunkenly) asked him what was going on..I don’t mind if he’s not interested but I don’t understand why he would continue to message me constantly?
erika995ParticipantSeptember 1, 2016 at 6:22 pm #110375
Anyway he mentioned his ex breaking up with him because she found it hard that he was away all the time (this was four years ago that they broke up..). A few days after our talk he text me asking if i wanted to go out again..I thought woo! finally! but then he ended up not being able to come because of some family get together, although did say he really wanted to meet up again when he was back home and he said the same several times while he was away at work. Now he has been back home for 2 weeks and is still messaging me but has mentioned literally nothing about meeting up! I’ve gotten really sick of this behaviour and decided to stop contacting him. I’m just wondering if this is the right decision? I really like him but I don’t know if he has some kind of insecurity issue that maybe every girl would react in the same way his ex did or if he is just some kind of serial texter and doesn’t actually ever plan on dating anyone and just likes to text?
somegirlParticipantSeptember 3, 2016 at 1:33 am #110478
I totally understand how you feel because I had the similar situation myself. I think he just treats you like kind of “backup”.
And its a right thing to do to stop talking to him for now
confusedtweenagerParticipantSeptember 3, 2016 at 2:46 am #110482
You are interested in the guy and the guy knows it and is taking advantage of that. He might be giving you a lot of attention and affection, but his end game is to have you on his hook so that he has somebody when his main options fall through. I suggest resisting the urge to be vulnerable with this guy (as this guy is clearly using that), and tell him upfront that you are not interested in playing games.
NYGirl99ParticipantSeptember 3, 2016 at 7:19 am #110491
Stop replying to his texts, and see what happens. If a guy likes you, he will see you-no matter what. Best of luck!
wanderlustParticipantSeptember 7, 2016 at 12:04 pm #110680
in my experience of dating, men really like to take super, super slowly — especially if you already gave in with sex. thats when they want to be extremely sure you are the one — its okay if you guys already had sex early in the game – but it tells him you don’t mind acting like u are in a relationship with him while you actually are not – i would suggest you to give yourself a deadline .. if he does not ask u out by a specific date, walk away. just walk away – if he really likes you, he will put more effort in pursuing you – i think the key to see if hes actually afraid to lose you or not.
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