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JustWonderingAboutParticipantFebruary 5, 2017 at 6:31 pm #125759
I don’t mind providing more details, but here is the basic info:
A woman I had a fling with prior to starting to date my gf propositioned me online.
I turned her down. I said, “Thanks but I’m seeing someone right now.”
She replied that “She knew.”
I decided to end the conversation and was typing out something to the effect that I had to get back to work. Glad you’re OK. Take care.
Then I saw more from her. She was talking about bragging about me. Then she mentioned that she’s friends with a gal that knows my gf and my gf adores me.
I deleted my planned reply and I asked what she meant and who she was bragging to. She then turned it around and said that she was happy for me, that I was a good guy, and wished me well.
I said thanks and I told her that I’m glad she was OK, I had been worried about her (she went back to an violent, controlling bf), and told her to take care.
My gf is angry that I didn’t call her out on her proposition, and that I was too nice. Thoughts?
MrCluelessParticipantFebruary 6, 2017 at 9:29 am #125780
Explain yourself rationally to your girlfriend and let her know she’s the one that matters to you
Sue315ParticipantFebruary 6, 2017 at 11:09 am #125804
Bye,bye to this other woman! She sounds like a trouble maker. Manipulator. If your gf is important to you I would delete her from your life! A “fling” doesn’t need to stay around when you have the real thing.
jlt045ParticipantFebruary 6, 2017 at 10:08 pm #125911
You did right. You only need to react more forcefully if she continues to pressure you
Mr.JParticipantFebruary 7, 2017 at 9:04 am #125929
Its girls nature, to get jealous. Most especially to those girls that some kind of bitchy, flirty, and those who they think that can turn your attention to them.
Girls always want to see that they are the one who you care the most, and girls don`t want to see their man looking to other girls.
They want you to show them that they are the only one who can get your FULL attention when they needed it most.
JonahLin84ParticipantFebruary 7, 2017 at 9:37 am #125940
Also explain that the fact you told your girlfriend was an action you took to garner trust. Say you don’t feel like you should be being punished for telling you things. The alternative is that you kept it a secret, which is what you don’t want.
A lot of people forget that when someone tells you something they think you might not like, it often is a sigh they “can” actually be trusted. Men and women.
It’s the things i find out on my own i worry about.
richiroParticipantFebruary 7, 2017 at 12:29 pm #125968
women are INSANELY jealous and competitive about other women – so you can’t do anything about that.
you did pretty much what you had to do – albeit you did “re-engage” with her after her last text.. that just gave her fuel to the fire that she might still have effect on you and can keep affecting you. That’s the only 1 mistake you made (but its only a mistake b/c that’s how females see it. not the way we see it).
Give a controlling, jealous girl an inch and she’ll make it look like a mountain and who knows how she is trying to portray it to “hopefully get back to yur woman” thru her back-end channels. Its very likely she’s saying or portraying it differently to her friend knowing it might get back to YOUR gf in that version, than the version that is accurate and that you portray to your gf. (2 onflicting stories – 1 from a woman, 1 from you? RECIPE FOR DISASTER!)
So.. don’t engage or reply with this woman. She’s on a mission.
Be open with your gf (even letting her see texts)
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