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T4816ParticipantMarch 31, 2020 at 9:36 pm #232415
I’ve been approaching women in real life a good amount the past year or so because I stopped using Tinder, Bumble, and other apps like that.
But I can’t help but notice that a lot of women seem shocked that I just confidently walked up and started talking to them without any reason other than I thought they were cute.
Got me wondering… are men approaching women in real life less nowadays with the rise of apps?
Men: Do you approach women? Why or why not?
tephrosParticipantApril 1, 2020 at 5:19 am #232420
Women were usually shocked when I approached them in random places where they wouldn’t expect a guy to hit on them back in… 2005 or so, undergrad. If it’s a party or a bar, they weren’t shocked.
I’ve done it most recently at the gym hot tub months ago, about 3 times. It would be a good place if any of the women were single, but I got a free massage out of it one time at least. It’s not like in college where most of the women you meet are single. At least on bumble or tinder you know they’re actually looking for something and probably think you’re attractive and sound like somebody they’d like. Sure it’s like 50/50 that the date will go well, versus higher if you knew them in real life before, but it still seems easier.
I mean, online dating has been around as long as I’ve been dating, and I’m not young. But back in the AOL days it was considered weird. I’d say yes, I approach IRL a lot less now.
dashingscorpioParticipantApril 1, 2020 at 1:35 pm #232477
Yes, many men especially young guys have chosen the cowardly approach to dating.
In fact when they do invite a woman to go out they preface it by inviting her to “hang out”.
I assume it helps them handle the rejection better if it’s not proposed as an actual DATE.
This forum as well as many other dating forums are filled with questions from would-be daters asking:
“How can I tell if she/he is into me?” or “What does it mean when…etc.?”
Everyone these days is looking for SIGNS because they all want a “sure thing” before pursuing anyone.
The reason why more guys hit on girls in nightclubs, bars, and online is because women tend to expect it.
On the other hand striking up a conversation at the grocery store, gas station, bank, or at McDonald’s is unexpected.
The belief by most guys is these women are strictly focused on handling their transaction.
Therefore hitting on them now is rude. They fear rejection.
In a world with over 7 billion people rejection just means: Next!
PheonixphantomParticipantApril 11, 2020 at 12:08 am #232706
I too am disgusted by how.dominant online dating has become.in our culture
jackryan664ParticipantApril 11, 2020 at 5:52 pm #232720
I would say so but women still appreciate the in person
AdrParkinsonParticipantApril 14, 2020 at 4:08 pm #232798
I’ve never approached a girl like that. Aside from my own social awkwardness, I feel like I’d be intruding in someone else’s space without permission.
AnonymousInactiveApril 19, 2020 at 2:52 pm #232944
Are men approaching women in real life less nowadays with the rise of apps? I would say so
JohncoeParticipantMay 1, 2020 at 4:42 pm #233251
I would say yes I guess they are it takes a lot of courage I think to be able to go up to a women or someone you dont know as a lot of men i assume would think that they dont want to be bothered and on dating apps you know they are on there to date so it’s kind of a green light okay shes interested in talking. On the other hand it is better to talk in person I think
lindaklamutParticipantMay 1, 2020 at 5:45 pm #233256
I think its wonderful that you do that. Shows that you are real. I think we are so used to this online business, that we have started to mistrust a real person, like woman or men don’t know what to do with that. Also, their isn’t the illusion when its not online, you are right there! I think you should continue doing this, theres alot of people ready for real.
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