Asking out a Co Worker when I have social anxiety

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Asking out a Co Worker when I have social anxiety

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Participant
    March 6, 2020 at 2:54 pm #231023
    Asking out a Co Worker when I have social anxiety

    Hi guys
    I’m in my mid 30s and suffered with social anxiety most my life, barely dated in my 20s and over the last few years I have got better, Online dating and Speed Dating and ive has a few relationships.

    But I need some advice on asking a co worker out . I’m in my mid 30s and she’s mid 20s we work in the same office 1 day a week and she might be interested in that i think she’s flirted with me a few times in meetings but here’s the problem
    We haven’t actually spoken much other that saying hi in the corridor as we pass . I’m not scared of rejection – I’m scared of her thinking I’m a creep as I’m over 10 years older than her and the general awkwardness it could cause if she’s say no and I have to then face her at work albeit we don’t work directly together .
    The easy way of course is to send her an email telling her I think she has a really nice personality and ask if she would like to meet for a drink . Not sure how that would come across or if I need to do Small talk 1st

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    March 8, 2020 at 3:06 am #231093

    One reason why most people don’t date co-workers is because most relationships don’t end in marriage.
    Therefore even if you did date your co-worker you may have to deal with working with an ex.

    “we work in the same office…”
    “We haven’t actually spoken much other than saying hi…”

    A 10 year age difference isn’t a big deal if someone is attracted to (you).
    To go from {not speaking} to asking someone out on a date is huge leap!

    By the way an email would be cowardly and more creepy under these circumstances.
    Also you’d be creating a “paper trail” for your HR department in the event she’s offended by being hit on.

    Establishing a basic rapport is the first step in finding out more information about her and if you have chemistry.
    If you’ve never talked, engaged in flirtatious banter, or shared laughs it’s way too soon to be asking her out.

    T4816
    T4816
    Participant
    March 31, 2020 at 9:35 pm #232414

    I don’t know if it’s the best idea to ask out a coworker.

    Have you tried just approaching women you find attractive in person?