Been out with over 100 guys!

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Been out with over 100 guys!

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Ilovemusic
    Ilovemusic
    Participant
    October 27, 2018 at 1:39 am #188028
    Been out with over 100 guys!

    I’m a 29 yr. old female and ive been on over 100 dates from a few different online dating sites the in the past 7 years. I’ve never had a boyfriend and only second dates with a few. What am I doing wrong? Has anyone else been out with this many people?

    jason90
    jason90
    Participant
    October 27, 2018 at 2:00 pm #188029

    I think you need to take some time to think about what is important to you in a partner. We can spend all of our lives looking for the “perfect” person, or we can accept that the perfect person doesn’t exist and that people have flaws. I would also suggest that you “screen” more guys out online before seeing them in person. If it’s not going to work out, it’s better to find out before the date, rather than afterwards. I would also remind you to remember that nothing is “wrong” with you just because you’ve never had a boyfriend. A change of perspective could be all that’s needed.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    October 28, 2018 at 4:11 pm #188054

    Saying “yes” to every guy who asks you out is the quickest way to experience burn out.

    As Jason90 suggested you need to figure out what you want and craft a screening process/must haves list.
    You can gradually get to know someone via email/instant messaging through online dating sites.
    Never feel obligated to rush out and meet someone before having determined if it’s worth your time.

    If a company were looking to fill a key position they would review every resume sent to them.
    Not everyone who sends in a resume receives a call from HR.
    Not everyone who has an interview with the HR rep gets passed on the hiring manager.
    Not everyone who has a phone interview with the hiring manager is invited to have a face to face interview.
    Not everyone who has a face to face interview is offered the position. There is a screening process.

    A second date is usually the result of having a great first date!
    That means having fun, establishing chemistry, similar humor, keep things light.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    October 28, 2018 at 4:28 pm #188055

    There could be numerous reasons why you haven’t found a boyfriend.
    Attitude and personality, lack of chemistry with those you’ve chosen to date, asking the wrong questions, being too serious early on, personal habits, communication style/tone, wrong topics discussed, coming off negative, cynical, or needy.

    Some people actually HATE dating!
    They want to “fast forward” through the “getting to know you” and jump into an exclusive relationship.
    They approach dating like they’re interrogating a person asking them tons of questions rapid fire style.
    Simply put, they’re on a “mission”! First date questions should be: What’s your favorite…? The goal is to have FUN.

    Most guys in their 20s are not proactively looking for a girlfriend.
    Their “serious relationships” are usually the result of a “casual relationship” which {evolved} over TIME!
    After several weeks or months of dating they became (comfortable) or maybe the girl pushed him to define/label the relationship.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    October 29, 2018 at 1:52 pm #188104

    ilovemusic – it is hard to comment on this until you tell us how the dates go. hwo you approach dates. what happens on the dates, etc. We don’t need details on EVERY SINGLE DATE, but if there are certain patterns that keep coming up – tell us those. If you want, you can tell us what happened with the last 1-3 guys you dated. But we need something to go on.

    one general potential thing that might be going on is: if you are tryign REAL HARD to impress somebody or want a bf THAT BAD and spend the date trying to win somebody over – that could be the problem. People that come on too strong or try too hard or it’s obvious they’re #1 is to BE with somebody – it gives off the “desperate” impression. And by that i mean, ‘i want a partner” is the #1 goal – could be anybody. That will push people away in general.

    Sammygirl
    Sammygirl
    Participant
    October 29, 2018 at 2:38 pm #188108

    It’s very hard out there.

    It seems like we arw not a good fit with anyone but in reality we’re meeting people on an online platform where almost everyone is not the one for us. It’s just impossible to know at first glance.

    Keep your head up.

    Ilovemusic
    Ilovemusic
    Participant
    October 30, 2018 at 8:43 pm #188221

    Most of the guys I’ve been out with have rejected me, I just get rejected over and over and over again. We talk abouit general getting to know you things, I’m average looking and so are they, I don’t what the problem is

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    October 31, 2018 at 10:27 am #188270

    Any woman who has had 100 guys ask her out and pay for dates probably looks better than “average”.

    There is always a reason why men asked YOU out as opposed to another woman. It’s because they saw something attractive in you.
    By and large men do not pursue dating women they find unattractive let alone invest their money on dates “just for fun”.
    Most likely the issue has to do with there being a lack of chemistry, personality issue, behavior, tone of conversation.
    You’re wrong for each other.

    In most instances one can screen out potential bad dates via a few phone conversations and multiple email exchanges.
    If you’ve haven’t had a lengthy phone conversation with someone containing flirty banter and laughter you shouldn’t go out.
    Odds are if there is no chemistry over the phone there won’t be any chemistry in person either.

    In some instances guys may be just looking to get laid and after meeting you they see you’re not a “booty call” type.
    They’re not looking for a relationship, just one night.

    kai83
    kai83
    Participant
    November 6, 2018 at 1:24 pm #188841
    Reply To: Been out with over 100 guys!

    Try dating someone below your market value?

    mdate
    mdate
    Participant
    November 6, 2018 at 4:06 pm #188876
    Reply To: Been out with over 100 guys!

    People on here should stop deleting my posts.