Casual sex and strong feelings

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Casual sex and strong feelings

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    alex2020
    alex2020
    Participant
    February 15, 2020 at 5:59 am #229700
    Casual sex and strong feelings

    I am 32 years old and met this 26 year old woman on tinder 1.5 years ago. She had just broken up from a 5 year relationship and just wanted to fool around with guys, which was perfect for me because I was not looking for anything serious either.
    Sex was amazing for both of us, but communication was problematic right from the start. She would answer my texts after 6 hours or the next day. She always seemed aloof and uninterested. Even though she treated me like she didn’t want to see me anymore, she would always get back to me and meet me once every 1 or 2 weeks just for sex (which as I said was awesome).
    The problem is I started to develop feelings for her, and at some point I realized that I had never loved someone so much. I know it sounds ridiculous but she was the only thing on my mind 24/7 and I was crying all day long. I had been in long term relationships in the past but I never knew what it actually meant to be in love until I met this special lady.
    At some point after one yea

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    February 15, 2020 at 10:29 am #229706

    “She had just broken up from a 5 year relationship and just wanted to fool around with guys,..”
    “She would answer my texts after 6 hours or the next day. She always seemed aloof and uninterested…”
    “she would always get back to me and meet me once every 1 or 2 weeks just for sex”
    “I know it sounds ridiculous but she was the only thing on my mind 24/7 and I was crying all day long..”

    When someone behaves like they’re in an “exclusive relationship” they become attached.
    After reading what you’ve stated at best this was a “booty call”!

    There is no “communication problem” when there is no relationship!
    Hooking up with you 2-4 times a month is all she wants and she may be {hooking up with other guys}.

    Sounds like YOUR Mistake was YOU didn’t keep YOUR options open by hooking up with other women.
    She’s NOT your girlfriend!

    Attempting to convert a “booty call” into a serious relationship rarely works especially one that’s lasted 1.5 years!
    Accept what she offers or move on.

    alex2020
    alex2020
    Participant
    February 15, 2020 at 12:08 pm #229707

    Thank you for your reply!
    By the way I have been hooking up with other girls too, and I still do it.
    But it’s never the same. I feel nothing about anybody else and I’m only happy when she’s around.
    But I guess the best thing to do is indeed finish it!

    Chad
    Chad
    Participant
    February 15, 2020 at 2:50 pm #229708

    At least you two shared something but, it’s too bad she doesn’t seem to reciprocate the feelings you have. If you can’t continue like this, guess you gotta make a choice which it looks like you’ve made so, now it seems it’s time to execute. I bet you’ll find a new and better love in no time, someone who perhaps would even be worth committing to …

    veeeronicac
    veeeronicac
    Participant
    February 25, 2020 at 4:44 pm #230463

    I am in a very similar situation. You need to be upfront with her and see if she reciprocates the feelings with you. If she doesn’t then do not let yourself get hurt any further.

    sdmsk
    sdmsk
    Participant
    February 25, 2020 at 5:05 pm #230466

    Tell her your feelings, if she loves you, great. If she doesnt, you need to move on.

    rebelx0024
    rebelx0024
    Participant
    February 27, 2020 at 5:31 pm #230604

    Yeah, guess you could make a long shot bid by telling her your feelings if you really wanted to, but it’s likely that nothing serious will happen at this point, especially if the booty call has lasted as long as it has. Just be prepared to move on.