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Catching a busy mans interest…January 3, 2017 at 9:14 pm #121566I met this guy many years ago through mutual friends a few times. Always had a crush on him but never presumed anything. Recently got out of a 4 year relationship and am now 30 which makes me feel incredibly insecure in myself and doubt myself whereas I didn’t use to. So the dating scene feels foreign and totally different to me. Struck up a convo with him on Facebook and we caught up a little back and forth over the past few weeks. We have said we should grab a drink and catch up. He is super busy. He owns a business with his family, is looking for new locations as well as house hunting. Any off timehe has, which isn’t often, he’s always doing things for the above mentioned. He replied all the time, even if it’s a few hours later, asks questions in return, but hasn’t really reached out first. As in it’s always me sending him a text to strike up convo. Being that he’s so busy how do I catch his attention or is that almost impossible right now with all he has going on?
January 4, 2017 at 3:47 pm #121738Ask him out on a low key date then you will know if he is interested or not.. Of course be understanding about his busy life and accept you would have to blend in with it…but there are limits to this. There has to be a baseline of attention and quality time. You might find that he is not that happy with his level of busy-ness, and perhaps you could gently point out to him the important things in life and in getting that work-life balance. If it doesn’t work in your favour that’s fine and you move on, there are plenty other blokes out there and you shouldn’t let your rustiness on the dating scene make you settle for a poor deal.
January 8, 2017 at 5:35 am #122150Everyone has time at least somewhere in the week. Maybe very rarely I could be too busy for a week (I own my own business as well) but in the end if I claimed I was busy for two whole weeks it would be because of disinterest. He may have friendzoned you because you’ve known him so long. Men do this less often than women do, but sometimes men do it too.
January 10, 2017 at 10:04 am #122391Adam, I’m supposed to just send him a picture, randomly, even though he hasn’t asked for one? Just like “hey here you go” that’s seems a little odd, desperate and like it’ll make me go backwards not forwards…
January 10, 2017 at 11:37 am #122420I am old school. I’d say let him make the first move. If he hasn’t yet, move on. I know dating at 30 and older after a breakup can be very hard but I did it and met my now husband. The first thing I did after my breakup was to focus on me and what I liked doing and actually doing it. There is nothing more attractive in a woman than being busy. Make a list of things you love doing and focus on that. At the very least it will take your mind off this and at the very best love will find you while you are busy.
January 10, 2017 at 4:40 pm #122500I say keep the door open and send him a text once a week with something light i.e. something funny you saw on TV etc. Maybe add a comment “I know you’re super busy but lets have a drink soon”… see what he says. Best of luck!
January 18, 2017 at 11:23 pm #123628nah you can’t do much more than yo have. that he is asking you questions back means you’ve cuaght his attention as much as you can. be forewarned that this just comes with the territory with entrepreneurs. their livelihood, and thus their lives, are caught up in that business. out of just pure financial survival they must be thinking business 24/7.
my best friend in SF started a small vape shop. its a small business.. but.. it been intersing to see how over 1 yr now (maybe 2) — not the only thing that comes out of his mouth is business related. its just the way it is and is why his business is successful.
so.. this comes with a warning label: if you need more than this, expect more – then yo umight want to move on. As the saying goes.. “the soulmate of an entrepreneur, their #1, will always be their business”. A partner will always have to be and accept being #2.
sorry.
October 5, 2017 at 5:54 am #151533I have a good taste for life, my dear) And all this I ready to sh… Continue Reading
I’ve been dating this guy for a little over two years. During the time we both were studying for the bar, we were on a break. He slept with his ex-fiancee once, and now she’s pregnant. I’m devastated and broken. I feel like a part of me has died. He’s the only guy I’ve ever loved. I put so much into this relationshipReply To: Catching a busy mans interest…October 6, 2017 at 3:40 am #151691You could casually mention getting together sometime, but if he isn’t going to be mutually interested then let it go. That doesn’t mean that you can’t be the one to come up with plans, or that you have to wait on him to come up with an idea – but if you aren’t saying exactly what you want, then you can’t expect him to know exactly what you want. So if you tell him, hey, i’d like for you to take me out sometime, and he still doesn’t consent, it’s time to let go of whatever it is attracting you to him and find someone that would complement you and your life.
Reply To: Catching a busy mans interest…November 25, 2017 at 10:50 am #157344I don’t think it’s impossible– you could try inviting him to hang out casually (drinks at a bar, get some coffee, etc). If he can’t make it, you can try rescheduling one more time and if he is unavailable, then MOVE ON. There are other guys out there who will be more than willing to go out on a date with you, and no matter how busy they are, will make the time for you.
Reply To: Catching a busy mans interest…July 4, 2018 at 12:35 pm #178662Try to make him miss you. Don’t send him a message first. Let him notice that there’s something wrong. If he really likes you then he will put an effort on you and he will notice when something is off. Goodluck 🙂
Reply To: Catching a busy mans interest…July 4, 2018 at 4:21 pm #178666“He……hasn’t really reached out first. As in {it’s always me} sending him a text to strike up convo.”
Truth is this guy is not romantically interested in you!
There are guys running multi-billion dollar corporations and even presidents of countries who “find time” for romance.
My point is no one is so busy they don’t have time to enjoy the company of someone {they’re attracted to}.“If you want me in your life, put me there. I shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.” – Anonymous
The goal is to be with someone where the interest is (mutual).
Reply To: Catching a busy mans interest…August 24, 2018 at 5:27 am #182498Ask him if he would like to hang out sometime and then see what he says.
Reply To: Catching a busy mans interest…January 6, 2019 at 12:52 am #191962I have a very busy female friend who never, ever asks me to hang out. But if I text her right now to do something next week she’ll always respond right away and we’ll connect.
So I think it might be like THIS. He may like someone just organizing for him as he’s so swamped. Give him a few options to get together and see if one works!
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