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MizzKat15ParticipantJanuary 23, 2017 at 8:25 pm #124203
So… my boyfriend and I have been dating for two years now and I am completely torn, lost and confused. Everything was going perfect between us till a couple months ago. So he has been without a job for about an year and a half and I have been his only financial support, now something you guys should know is that he is a hardcore gamer. Now I knew that going into the relationship and I was okay with it, I like playing occasionally as well. But lately all and I mean all he does is play and play with his friend. From seven am till almost one am that is all he does. I’ve tried talking to him and all he does is make me seem like a selfish girlfriend because according to him I am making him chose between his games and me. What the heck do I do??? Part of me wants to just end the relationship, but I love him. I even told him I feel sometimes like the games come before me…please help I don’t know what to do? Thanks in advance!
richiroParticipantJanuary 24, 2017 at 3:59 pm #124301
you leave him. like he said… he can not see a life where he can focus on both you and his games – and he’s clearing choosing games. so that means he has NOT chosen you.
let him go. i’ve seen this play out with many female friends of mine (who even got married). guess what happens 10 yrs from now, 20 yrs from now, 30 yrs from now? That’s right. hes still unemployed, playing games all day, spending YOUR money.. and making you feel guilty for it.
He’s looking for a gravy train to pay his way so he can goof off with games all day. Is that what you want? If not.. leave. If so, enjoy.
YouParticipantJanuary 25, 2017 at 12:58 am #124365
I’m a pretty avid gamer, too, when I have the time. However, I don’t think that it’s right to let anything become an addiction that hurts oneself and others. Have you told him that he’s making you feel guilty even though you know that you’re not at fault? You say you love him, so there’s more to the relationship on your end than just the video games. Dumping him ill hopefully end all of the problems for you, but if you like him enough to stick with him for this long already, you could also try to change him for the better. You’ll have to be very serious about it, and ready to confront any excuses and attempts to shift the blame if you go down that route. If he’s playing video games with the same friend or friends all of the time, ou could try talking to them for advice, since they know him on a personal level, too.
MizzKat15ParticipantJanuary 26, 2017 at 8:58 pm #124710
Thank you Richiro and You for the advice! You guys made very good and strong points that I am definitely going to try and hope for the best! : )
richiroParticipantJanuary 27, 2017 at 3:26 pm #124808
people don’t change for the better and he has certainly not showwn any inclination to change anything (why? he’s getting free sex and a free ride).
“trying to change” people into the s/o you want is the oldes trick in the book and it NEVER WORKS.
So you either have to decide what he is is okay or not for you and stop complaininga bout it…
or you decide he’s not for you and leave him and find somebody who IS for you.
Life is simple.
We complicate it too much on our own.
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