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starfish28ParticipantJune 22, 2013 at 1:26 am #33975
I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year now, however we are both collee students so of this year, about 5 months have been apart total. We are each others first relationship and this summer I am finding the distance to be a lot harder than last year. Last summer we had just started dating so I guess that “honeymoon” stage got me through the summer. This summer however I keep having doubts about us and I know it is stressing him out how much I freak out and become so insecure. I told him about 4 months ago that I loved him and he did not say it back which I was fine with bc I didn’t want him to feel pressured. It didnt bother me until months went by and still nothing. We have a great relationship full of trust and communication and we talked about what love means and I know for him he only wants to say it when he feels strongly enough with the person that he feels like they are compatible enough for marriage. I understand that is how is was raised and so I can’t expect him to change his criteria for love just as I wouldn’t expect him to try and change mine. However not having this reassurance is hard for long distance. He is much more of an action type of guy for showing his feelings. He visited last weekend and it was perfect, I didn’t doubt for a minute how strongly he felt, I could feel it in the way e treated me and looked at me, everything about his visit was perfect. But now that he’s gone I cannot help but feel that doubt again. I don’t know if he’s the one but I’m ony 21 and am in no rush to find my husband. I figure if I am happy with him I should stay with him c we have a good time together. You learn a lot from relationships so I figure why not if I am happy and feel strongly for him. I guess I just need help on removing doubt bc I know by me pushing him to say I love you is really just pushing him away. We also haven’t had sex and are both virgins. I had always assumed I would have sex before marriage if I loved them but he wants to wait. This is something that didnt bother me until I was surrounded by my fiends back at home where I am this summer bc all they talk about is sex. We talked about it today and didnt fight but had serious conversation and I told him I would give him his space to think about things and he says he wants to think more and talk tomorrow about it. I really need to talk to someone because I am so scared he will walk out soon.
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