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Girl1980sParticipantJuly 9, 2017 at 4:28 am #141423
I met this guy on pof He seemed really nice and is local We talked for 3 weeks via text. He told me he was looking for a relationship just like me. After about a week he told me that he was infatuated with me. But it seemed like he was more infatuated with my looks than anything else. He kept sending me mixed signals as to what he really wanted. But he kept saying he wanted a relationship with me despite the mixed signals. I felt like maybe he friend-zoned me. So I suggested friends with benefits hoping maybe he would see me as more relationship material. So we hooked up. After we hooked up we talked for a few days and then he just ghosted me. So I let 2 months pass then texted him. Ask him why he ignored me and he said he lost his phone and all his contacts. Then he wanted to start talking again. But we did have a lot in common . I know he is lying about losing his phone though My question is do you think he put me in the friend zone or did he intentionally set out to use me for sex?
morrowrdParticipantJuly 9, 2017 at 6:44 am #141424
The online dating culture is one where finding a relationship takes patience and time. Meeting up, sleeping together, and then disappearing is one of the norms. Another is meeting, sparks fly, there’s “chemistry” and an exclusive relationship materializes rather quickly. Lots of sex and time together, and after one to three months, one of the two changes their minds and disappears. Online dating is an excellent resource to meet a life partner, provided one uses boundaries, and is patient. The temptation to have sex is pretty strong, the problem with that is when the emotional bonding begins, and one or the other starts seeing incompatibilities that are something they can’t live with, the disappearing acts happen. That causes so much confusion for the other person, and like yourself, wondering “what did I do?” Know that you’re in a pretty big club…. next time, take your time with the sex part, focus on getting to know each other better. It’s hard I know.
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