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tritonParticipantNovember 29, 2013 at 11:48 am #43683
So, this girl and I went together to a ball together. We got along really well and things hit off. We didn’t really do anything serious just made out the next day. She lives about 2 hours away but I am there every weekend. After she left I texted her and I guess I over did the texting over the next couple days. For the first few days we talked allot but after that she stopped being responsive and after trying for a bit I stopped. One of her friends messaged a friend of mine saying that I need to ease up on the messages. She texted me today, saying that she’s going through allot of stresses in her life and its all overwhelming, I hope you can respect my space and I hope we can be friends. She needs to go to counselling about what happened and her feelings. (her ex cheated on her) She says she’s confused and needs to figure things out. I have decided to stop messaging her and wait for her to message me. As well I will not be going back to her area for another 2 weeks. any chances left?
Tacoma123ParticipantNovember 30, 2013 at 9:22 am #43698
Im sorry but I think that is her way of not getting involved without hurting your feelings, I would move on.
SharpParticipantNovember 30, 2013 at 3:01 pm #43700
I would say stop texting her altogether. At the same time, get to know other girls and be social and have fun meeting new people. When she is done going through her issues, she may see you being social and happy and will be attracted to that If she needs counseling because she is so upset, I would not pursue her at all right now. Not because I think she is broken or anything, but because if she is going through a difficult time in her life and cannot figure out her emotions, then she may feel things for you now that will change later. ork on stabilizing your social life and when she is able to stabilize her emotional life, hen you will be able to connect with her in a healthy meaningful way. Be patient, it may take her a long time to get to that point, and accept the fact that she may never become attracted to you. Move on and put yourself in a place where you can help her whn she needs it and then you can decie if you still even like her.
PaulineRhodesParticipantDecember 2, 2013 at 2:29 pm #43722
Of course, you still have a shot, but I think you might want to reconsider for your own good. Look at what is happening at this point. You state she is emotionally distraught about a bad ending to a relationship. That is signal number one to back off and look around. She wants to be friends. That is signal number two that she is not looking at a romantic relationship with you. Her statement to “respect her space” is signal number three that she is not highly interested.
Your only hope at this time is to stop being a “desperate chaser” and start being a concerned friend. Wait a week and just text a simple statement like, “Hope you are feeling fine, take care.” Wait another week or two and drop another simple text like, “If you ever need a friend to chat with I would be happy to listen.” Just let her know you are a friend and back off. She will either warm-up, or you will have your answer.
gerpaciParticipantDecember 10, 2013 at 4:13 pm #44354
you still have a shot. be patient and see what happens
TLRodParticipantDecember 11, 2013 at 7:15 pm #44464
I think you have a shot. At least she let you know what she’s dealing with.
Mimi94ParticipantDecember 13, 2013 at 5:15 am #44506
She seems freaked out by all the messages. I say cut your losses, move on, and maybe ease up on the contact with other girls. You sound like a great guy so let them find that out themselves 🙂
MiddleEasternDollParticipantDecember 18, 2013 at 4:55 pm #44846
It certainly doesn’t seem like you should take the happenings personally at all! Every individual has his or her own issues and deals with them in a particular way. Have fun, meet new people, and enjoy life! Things that are meant to happen always find their way eventually. 🙂
raven1018ParticipantDecember 22, 2013 at 4:46 am #45136
Dont take it personally.
Sometimes personal/menatal health issues affect people more than you know.
If she needs space, give that to her.
But every few weeks or maybe once a month it would not hurt to check up on her or leave a “hey how have you been doing text” so she knows your really care.
If she is really unresponsive/unappreciated or cold I would just leave it at that and not get in touch for a while.
mcr2013ParticipantDecember 22, 2013 at 5:20 pm #45148
Give her space. I almost guarantee she will text or call you again. Maybe in a couple weeks send a laid back message just checking in to see how she is.
Frank2thepointParticipantDecember 22, 2013 at 5:47 pm #45154
Something similar happened to me recently. But all I got was “not ready for a serious relationship” and that she got out of bad relationship as well. It’s a tough break, but my advice, as I will follow my own, is just be friends with her. Give her space and keep your options open. Focus on yourself, hobbies, friends, and continue looking for another girl. Whether this girl comes around during your friendship with her, or she doesn’t even make an effort to be friends, either way YOU have to move on.
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