Do I tell him how I feel?

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Do I tell him how I feel?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    doggos4life
    doggos4life
    Participant
    March 10, 2020 at 8:28 am #231273
    Do I tell him how I feel?

    I’m 22. I’ve been seeing this guy (25) since early December. He’s from overseas and his tinder bio said he wanted someone to get high with, which I was down for. I’ve now been seeing him for at least one night each week – sometimes we’ll spend whole weekends together. He’s really chill, genuine, rational, non-romantic, doesn’t talk much about feelings and is bad at showing signs when he likes someone (he said to me). He’s independent and plans to travel the next few years aka doesn’t plan to settle. In the beginning when I started seeing him, he used to say a few sweet things; like he was lucky to have found me, that he loved having me over and that we should get a van and travel together. We have a really good, even deep, connection. Despite all of that, I wouldn’t say we’re dating – maybe cause I get the feeling he’s not in for that (he’s too independent). I honestly don’t know ‘what we are’

    Rest in comments..

    • This topic was modified 3 weeks, 2 days ago by doggos4life doggos4life.
    • This topic was modified 3 weeks, 2 days ago by doggos4life doggos4life.
    doggos4life
    doggos4life
    Participant
    March 10, 2020 at 8:28 am #231274

    Recently, I’ve become unsure if he’s as into me as he used to be. He doesn’t say those sweet things, has chosen to see his friends over me once or twice and doesn’t message as spontaneously (maybe I’m overthinking?). I do think he wants to keep seeing me on weekends though and would be down to do things together here and there. But I don’t know if he’s lost the few feelings that he had. He did mention, though, that in his last relationship they never discussed ‘what they were’ – they just became a couple, it happened over time. Meanwhile, I’m growing stronger feelings for him and am wondering wtf is happening

    Is he just being a dumb boy who doesn’t know how to show feelings?

    Should I talk to him about some of my feelings or will that scare him?

    Is he clearly not into me anymore?

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    March 10, 2020 at 12:06 pm #231295

    “..his tinder bio said he wanted someone to get high with, which I was down for.”
    “He’s really chill, genuine, rational, non-romantic, doesn’t talk much about feelings..”
    “He’s independent and plans to travel the next few years aka doesn’t plan to settle.”
    “We have a really good, even deep, connection. Despite all of that, I wouldn’t say we’re dating..”
    “I honestly don’t know ‘what we are.”

    Here’s the deal you signed up for a {no strings attached} casual dating arrangement with a guy on Tinder.
    Most likely he still has an ACTIVE profile and is open to seeing other women.

    He’s not looking for a girlfriend or a wife. At best you’re in what’s called a “situationship” or undefined relationship.
    From his point of view you get high together, hookup, and enjoy each other’s company a few times per month.

    He was never “into you” per se he thought he found a girl who was “cool” and on the same page as him.
    If you have to “figure out” a guy it means he’s NOT into you!

    If you want more you can either ask him for more, keep your options open by dating other guys, or move on.
    In order for (him) to be “the one” he would have to see (you) as being “the one”.
    At the very least a “soulmate” is someone who actually wants to be with you!

    “Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” – Oscar Wilde

    Blessed7
    Blessed7
    Participant
    March 10, 2020 at 6:09 pm #231336

    He’s not in you.
    One needs to understand that a man can have sex with a woman but not be in love with her. Yet for women sex and love are intertwined.

    It’s clear, he thought you understood the bargain, and maybe he aint ready to settle for reasons best known to him.

    hrvymalaysia
    hrvymalaysia
    Participant
    March 12, 2020 at 12:05 am #231397

    This guy, he seems somewhat emotionally unavailable and therefore I feel like he’s just being casual about things. Although you should give him credit for being upfront and honest with you. It might be too late to say this but you need to guard your heart and know what you want from this “relationship” you have with him and dont keep waiting around for something that might never happen 🙁

    Nina29
    Nina29
    Participant
    March 12, 2020 at 2:45 pm #231432

    I am on the same situation