Does he just want sex?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Does he just want sex?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Justina1412
    Justina1412
    Participant
    October 15, 2018 at 2:07 pm #187048
    Does he just want sex?

    Hi all, I am a 21 year old woman. I met a guy (23) after my pottery class who has a ton in common with me. I think that he is very good looking (although he has some bad acne) and he is very smart and I know he will be a successful lawyer one day. He is the kind of guy that I could see myself getting into a long-term relationship with.

    He asked me out after pottery class one day and I said yes, we exchanged numbers. He texted me to set up a date that evening and we went out the following Thursday afternoon. We grabbed coffee and walked around for a while and had a nice conversation. He said that he would like to take me out on date later next week and I agreed.

    The next week we went out on date, it went really well and we made out on his couch. I didn’t want to sleep with him yet so I always kept my dress pulled down, even though I know he wanted to pull it up. He wasn’t pushy but it was clear what he wanted.

    After this night, he didn’t text me for 4 days…. (continued)

    Justina1412
    Justina1412
    Participant
    October 15, 2018 at 2:11 pm #187049

    (continued)…. but when he did reach out he simply asked for another date. I said that I would like to go out with him, but that I had a very busy weekend so I didn’t know if I could make it on the day that he proposed. He said that if I couldn’t make it, we should just set it for another day when I was free. I agreed to the date because I didn’t want to lose it as a possibility, even though I knew I probably couldn’t make it. The day before our date, I knew I wasn’t going to have time to go out with him because of all the work that had piled up so I cancelled the date but told him I’d definitely like to go out some time soon.

    Two weeks passed and he never contacted me so I texted him and asked him if he’d like to go out Saturday to a movie. He responded that he didn’t like going to the theaters, but that I was welcome to come over to his house to make some food and watch an old movie there. I felt like he was just trying to get in my pants so I said yes, but didn’t reply (continued)

    Justina1412
    Justina1412
    Participant
    October 16, 2018 at 8:42 am #187050

    (continued)… to his text message when he asked me what time I was free. Two days later I told him that I was sorry that I hadn’t texted him back but that my friends had come in from out of town and surprised me and that i’d be busy with them all weekend. He replied the following day with a very lukewarm “have fun” type of response.

    I can’t tell if this guy is worth my time or if I should just cut him off because all he wants is sex. He seems like a genuine, funny and nice person when we are together, but his texting behavior and his date ideas seem to always lead to the bedroom. I don’t want to just give up sex so easily and then get dumped.

    Should I move on or give him another chance if he reaches out with another (non-sex) date?

    Justina1412
    Justina1412
    Participant
    October 16, 2018 at 8:42 am #187051

    (continued)

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    October 17, 2018 at 12:24 pm #187260

    Most 20 something year old guys are not looking to settle down.
    They want to establish a career, party with friends, watch sports, play video games, and get laid!

    Any relationships they do have are usually accidental. In other words they weren’t “looking for a girlfriend”.
    Sometimes casual dating and sex gradually evolves into something more.
    My advice to you if you’re looking to have a serious relationship is to date men in their late 20s or early 30s.
    Only have sex because you want to and not because of some hidden agenda.

    Having sex with men doesn’t turn them into jerks. Most likely they were already a jerks.

    However just because someone only wants to have sex with you doesn’t make them a jerk.
    Sometimes two people simply do not want the same things. If that is the case you should move on.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    October 17, 2018 at 4:04 pm #187305

    yeah.. definitely sounds like somebody just trying to get into your pants. sorry.
    you can make one last ditch effort to have another date in PUBLIC and see how enthusiastic he is. if not – he jus wants to get in your pants.

    Libra82
    Libra82
    Participant
    October 17, 2018 at 5:59 pm #187341

    He’s following a dating book. I am not going to say which one.. However, the stuff he has said to you is almost identical. Basically, he is trying to measure your interest in him.. Ultimately leading things to the bedroom. It’s not necessarily bad… It’s going to be alot easier for both of you if you lay your cards on the table how you feel about his behavior.. If he is truly interested in more than sex.. he will listen and change his approche. It will only go as far as you allow it to go.. It’s all in how you feel..

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    October 18, 2018 at 2:12 pm #187423

    and most of those “dating books” are focused on getting sex… so yes.. hes’ just wanting to get sex…

    missjewelz
    missjewelz
    Participant
    October 20, 2018 at 3:53 pm #187606

    It sounds like he might not be looking for a long term relationship himself. Alot of guys that age are not mature enough to understand serious relationships. I would move on, but if you still like him you can give it one more try, but dont give into him just to try to keep him around. If he doesnt go out of his way to plan fun dates and just wants to stay home or be in the bedroom, I would move on for sure.

    Loogy_1234
    Loogy_1234
    Participant
    October 26, 2018 at 5:29 am #187939
    Reply To: Does he just want sex?

    He just wants fun and not a relationship.

    Cykide
    Cykide
    Participant
    October 26, 2018 at 2:52 pm #187987
    Reply To: Does he just want sex?

    Most of those “dating books” are focused on getting sex

    JaneWalters
    JaneWalters
    Participant
    October 29, 2018 at 4:43 pm #188121
    Reply To: Does he just want sex?

    it is purely for fun i think