Don't want to tell men I"m retired..help?

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Don't want to tell men I"m retired..help?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    MysteryWoman
    MysteryWoman
    Participant
    June 5, 2018 at 12:03 am #176196
    Don't want to tell men I"m retired..help?

    Hello, I’m 47 but the age range I date is 45-54 so I thought I would post here instead of expecting people in their 20’s to relate. This is a mature topic
    I received an early medical retirement from my employer due to a work injury. Due to my pension and being fiscally responsible, I do not have to work again. This creates a dilemma because I”m getting the idea it’s a turn off for men to date women who are retired or they think I’m disabled? I’m not, just can’t do my emergency responder job anymore due to the dangerous nature of work and risk of re injury.
    How do I not tell people I”m retired without lying? I don’t want to tell a man I first meet my finances. I’m also afraid of attracting freeloader type men who find my never ending pension more attractive than me. I could say I have a job but it would take a lot of lies and they would eventually find out if we got serious and ruin trust?. How do you avoid saying what you do for a living without seeming sketchy?

    MysteryWoman
    MysteryWoman
    Participant
    June 5, 2018 at 12:04 am #176197

    Also, I read if a man is retired that makes him sound wealthy, but if a woman is retired, that makes her sound old. Dating is so shallow!

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    June 12, 2018 at 11:35 am #176814

    You always have the option of turning a hobby or interest into a career.
    There’s nothing wrong with saying you retired from your old job and now focus on writing or whatever it is you enjoy dong.
    At only age 47 it’s probably a good idea to pursue a “dream career” anyway.

    It’s never about who is “attracted to us” as it is who (we) find attractive.
    Nothing happens until you say: “Yes” to someone. (Choose wisely!)

    Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself.

    Each of us chooses our own friends, lovers, and spouse.
    Each of us has our own mate selection process/ “must haves lists”
    Each of us has our boundaries and “deal breakers”.

    When Hugh Hefner was 86 he married Crystal Harris age 26 a former centerfold model.
    Most men are not interested in dating women for their money.
    They’d rather date a hot looking cocktail waitress over a “Plain Jane” heart surgeon.
    Physical attraction, personality, and a great sense of humor are the keys for most men.

    Firas
    Firas
    Participant
    June 12, 2018 at 7:37 pm #176871

    I dont see where is the problem

    just dont tell him untail u have decided to move to the next step

    good luck

    doninvaughan
    doninvaughan
    Participant
    August 17, 2018 at 3:49 pm #181865

    I personally don’t see any issue with dating a woman who has retired.
    But if you’re not comfortable telling your date about your retirement, then just simply respond that you’re “currently not working” if someone asks what you do, which is also the truth.

    monty
    monty
    Participant
    October 11, 2018 at 2:31 am #186735

    I’m a man who left my career of almost 40 years to retire but regret it now so I currently am looking for part time work. I too felt awkward if a woman asked me what I do a for a living but now just say that I’m working at my leisure.