Ex believes I was stalking her is there anyway to improve her view of me.

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Ex believes I was stalking her is there anyway to improve her view of me.

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    February 2, 2020 at 5:07 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Grimlokk
    Grimlokk
    Participant
    February 7, 2020 at 7:04 am #229226
    Ex believes I was stalking her is there anyway to improve her view of me.

    We had a rollercoaster of a relationship. Pretty sure she has BPD, which explains a lot of the fights. I kept trying to repair things between us, as when it was good things were amazing. All of her friendships were always exploding, and most of her friends were ex-boyfriends.

    Slowly, she ghosted me. During this time I started searching social media as I was curious. I let her know at our last meeting I found her MySpace during a time when we were not speaking. After that meeting I texted her to let her know I still had feelings. I was sick of hiding them. I still occasionally search for her, if I try to get in touch I just get told to go away and get blocked.

    Being with her really helped me through a hard time in my life. Since I was the anxious partner I’m aware of our dynamic, and why everything fell apart. She’s an avoidant, and had a similarly traumatic childhood. Therapy has helped me immensely. Is there anyway to get back to speaking terms and get her into therapy?

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    February 7, 2020 at 11:46 am #229261

    “Ex believes I was stalking her…”
    “.. she ghosted me. During this time I started searching social media..”
    “I texted her to let her know I still had feelings.”
    ” I still occasionally search for her, if I try to get in touch I just get told to go away and get blocked.”

    Based upon the aforementioned statements it’s understandable why she feels you’re stalking her!
    If someone does not wish to be contacted by you and you keep doing it anyway that is stalking.

    “Is there anyway to get back to speaking terms and get her into therapy?”

    The best friendships between (exes) usually occurs after a LARGE GAP in time.
    Generally when both people have moved on and found love with someone new.
    It’s unrealistic to expect to go from being “red hot lovers” to instant platonic friends resembling siblings.

    Secondly; Life is a (personal) journey. If she wants therapy SHE will seek it.

    Lastly in order for (her) to be “the one” she would have to see (you) as being “the one”.
    At the very least a “soulmate” is someone who actually wants to be with you!

    In a world with over 7 Billion people rejection just means: Next!

    Koolio14
    Koolio14
    Participant
    February 13, 2020 at 12:20 am #229563

    back off and leave her alone for a while and after time they’ll move on