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123doremeParticipantMarch 12, 2020 at 2:51 pm #231435
I’ve been on and off flirting with a coworker for years, and eventually made the first move and we hooked up (no sex). I ended up telling him that I don’t want to take it further because I knew I would be emotionally involved, and that is not what he wants in life. We continued to work well together (2 years), and there was always a care factor there; we always looked out for each other. I did hear that he was sleeping with another coworker for a while, but when they stopped, he vented to me that she was crazy and he had to stay away. Every year we bought each other sentimental small gifts for the holidays and even this past season, we bought each other gifts, texted each other wishing each other the best, etc. All of sudden, there was shift in the tides, and he stopped talking to me. He doesn’t even make eye contact, keeps his distance, even walks the other way when he sees me. He is now “best friends” with the “crazy” coworker again and they are attached at the hip. WHAT HAPPENED!?
dashingscorpioParticipantMarch 13, 2020 at 8:47 am #231482
Maybe he and his ex are back together.
If so she may have laid down a rule that he is to stop associating with you.
People often wonder if men and women can be “platonic friends”.
Sometimes even when they are one of them falls for someone who doesn’t approve of their friendship.
Odds are if a person has to (choose) between maintaining a “platonic friendship” or love they’ll choose love.
In the event he has a falling out with the co-worker he’ll probably look to reconnect with you down the line.
That’s just life!
DenverGuyParticipantMarch 14, 2020 at 9:33 am #231514
Well, you did say you didn’t want to be emotionally involved. It sounds like he hooked up with someone who wanted that – the one he is attached at the hip to.
ConFuzdParticipantMarch 15, 2020 at 10:16 am #231523
Too many slippery slopes has been walked upon, there’s so many wrongs here and being flirtatious with a co-worker tends to cause a world of problems on its own; regardless of who initiated it. Then to top things off, there’s already workplace gossip about the guy and another female co-worker and that alone should’ve raised extra red flags for you to not enter into anything with him. Yes, I read why you said there was no sexual contact between you two; but was there contact between him and the other co-worker…that you’ll never know unless the two openly admit to such acts regardless of him venting to you about her being crazy and he had to leave her alone but nothing mention of their illicit affair; which I don’t think that would be the case because they have so much to loose. I would err with cautious because you don’t want to put yourself into a situation dealing with him. They’re back together, you need happiness without those two.
ConFuzdParticipantMarch 15, 2020 at 10:28 am #231524
I never could understand why someone would put someone through so much when they’re trying to get to know someone; it’s never about the fact that someone would have to worship the “grounds” they’re walking; figurative speaking. Either the two or friends or having a friendship which there’s a greater difference in the two and no book should be used to dictate or manipulate a single person to feel a certain way about a single person. You have to ask yourself this questions; where would your relationship with him be without that book? See, it takes a dedicated effort of the two to work together to understand what the two have in common with each other and hopes that the two are able to reciprocate the same love, attention, affections, emotions, empathy, dedications,,,etc. in returns and no material thing can bring that and nor can a book; if the two are having issues then the two needs to sit down and talk and if counseling is needed; I highly recommend it to enhance the relationship.
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