Going out as friends

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Going out as friends

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    July 7, 2020 at 10:28 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    herkamer63
    herkamer63
    Participant
    December 29, 2019 at 8:23 am #227032
    Going out as friends

    If anyone had read my last thread, “Potential Date Coming”, I asked the woman out last night. For a lite background, we have known each other for 2-3 years, and we have some of the same interests. When I asked last night, she did say she has a boyfriend. However, she DID say she would like to go out as friends, which I said was fine because I when I asked her, I had said it was going to get a little harder heading up her way since she lives in another town (and I actually getting ready to do a lot of traveling here soon).

    She did hug me and seemed happy. Now, I need to send her a message because she asked me too. My question is when do I send that message? I asked her out last night (1/29/19) and I thought about messaging her tomorrow (1/30/19). Is that too soon, too late, or just right? I don’t want to give her the wrong impression is all because I do like her, but I want to respect her space, even though our relationship seems pretty good. I don’t want to screw this up. Thanks!

    JesperT
    JesperT
    Participant
    December 29, 2019 at 11:23 am #227034

    I am getting the feeling this could turn out for the worst.
    If you are expecting a date and she just “want so be friends” there will typically be problems. Typically she will never start see you as anything else as a friend.
    I wish you good luck, but just don’t hope for too much,

    About the message, I don’t really understand what the purpose of the message is? To set up the time for the meeting/date?
    If she told you to message her, I don’t see the problem in doing it the next day. If she is really interested such things wont matter very much.
    If you wait way too long I suppose it might seem strange.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    December 29, 2019 at 6:56 pm #227049

    “..she did say she has a boyfriend. However, she DID say she would like to go out as friends,..”

    True “friends” can grab a bite to eat or meet for cocktails anytime. There shouldn’t be any urgency on your part.
    Secondly since she has a boyfriend it’s a good chance they may have end of year plans through New Year’s Day.

    Since you’re “just friends” you can touch base with her in a couple of weeks.
    In the meantime you should be focusing on other women for pursuing (romantic) dating opportunities.

    I wouldn’t invest a lot of time, energy, or money to travel to another town just to have a face to face conversation with a friend. It’s one thing if you’re going to be in the area and it’s a whole other thing making (special) arrangements.

    Be honest with YOURSELF! If you’re hoping to convert a friendship into a relationship you have a “hidden agenda”!
    If you truly see her as just a “platonic friend/sibling” person to (hang out with) then there should be no rush to see her.

    Angel7777
    Angel7777
    Participant
    December 30, 2019 at 2:08 am #227056

    As a woman she likes you, but has a boyfriend as long as no ring on her finger its ok.