Having issues with the heart and mind during a bad time in my life

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Having issues with the heart and mind during a bad time in my life

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    WriterMommy
    WriterMommy
    Participant
    June 20, 2018 at 7:52 pm #177610
    Having issues with the heart and mind during a bad time in my life

    To put this simple: I am in love with my ex (J) and have loved him for years. I am married, have 2 kids, and my husband (R) is now in legal trouble again for a crime he was convicted of (falsely) 2 years ago. I want to leave R. I’ve been talking to J about this lately. Tonight I almost confessed to J that I loved him. Before I could J told me he was in love with another girl (who was younger, claimed she loved him yet blocks him every time she gets a bf) and that even though he’s told me before that he loved me and always will he now says that he could never go back to me because his heart belongs to this girl. I understand, and I am ready to be a single mom to my kids. I don’t love R anymore. But I don’t know if I should still tell J of my feelings? J and I have told each other in the past that we did still have love for each other but he respected the fact I was married. He has been increasingly worried of my failing marriage. My heart and mind are giving me different answers…

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    June 20, 2018 at 8:13 pm #177612

    “Tonight I almost confessed to J that I loved him.”
    “J told me he was in love with another girl…”
    “I don’t know if I should still tell J of my feelings…”

    The answer is NO!
    If a man is “into YOU” he’s not going to tell you he’s in love with another woman!
    Secondly why on earth would you want to be with a man who you know is “in love’ with another woman?

    There are some people who treat relationships like jobs.
    They won’t leave one unless they have another one lined up.

    You need to figure out if the thought of you being with (J) is what’s truly motivating you to want to leave (R)
    Imagine your life without either man in your life. Are you ready to start with a clean slate?
    Do what’s in your (two children’s) best interest.

    Lastly you said: “I want to leave R. I’ve been talking to J about this lately.”
    “He has been increasingly worried of my failing marriage.” (Doesn’t exactly sound like he’s encouraging you to leave.)

    Firas
    Firas
    Participant
    June 23, 2018 at 6:38 am #177814

    DRAMA